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Enjoyment without expectation is the objective
3/17/01 11:37:50 AM Eastern Standard Time
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Abboudian send the following "FYI":
www.theglobeandmail.com
Arts + Books Wednesday, March 11, 1998 By Carolyn Abraham
Commentary The Globe and Mail
The combined aromas of cucumber and the black-licorice candy Good & Plenty
appear to boost sexual arousal in women more than expensive fragrances, an
Illinois researcher has found.
Dr. Alan Hirsch, a neurologist and psychiatrist at Chicago's Smell and Taste
Treatment and Research Foundation, concluded that men's colognes actually
impaired physiological sexual responses, and some food odors unexpectedly
increased them during a study involving 30 women, aged 18 to 40.
"If your purpose in wearing cologne is to enhance sexual arousal," Dr.
Hirsch said, "you may want to try something else."
Dr. Hirsch has spent 14 years studying the impact of smells on human
behaviour in areas of memory, visual perception and weight loss. His
investigation of sexual responses began after he realized that nearly
one-quarter of 46 patients who had lost their sense of smell as a result of
a head injury had also developed some sexual dysfunction.
Researchers hope their work will not only improve boudoir encounters but
eventually suggest new treatments for sexual disorders. The results are to
be presented today at the annual meeting of the American Psychosomatic
Society in Florida.
In Dr. Hirsch's study, women exposed to the scent combination of cucumber
and licorice candy experienced an average vaginal blood-flow increase of 14
per cent. Baby powder, or the combination of pumpkin pie and lavender, also
prompted significant increases. Chocolate and perfume raised flow levels
less than 5 per cent; charcoal-barbecued meat and cherry appeared to be big
turnoffs.
Rates of vaginal blood flow are considered conventional indicators of sexual
arousal. Dramatic changes in flow rates are generally seen during such
events as the uterine contractions associated with labour during childbirth.
"It is unlikely to be a coincidence when you have greater than a 10 per cent
change in response to vaginal blood flow," Dr. Hirsch said. "There could be
some natural fluctuation, but not at that level."
Three years ago, Dr. Hirsch studied odors that increased penile blood flow
in men. Similar to the results in women, pumpkin pie with lavender tended to
cause the greatest arousal in testing 55 men, aged 18 to 64. One man was
aroused by these odors even as he slept through the testing process.
Cinnamon buns also had a significant positive effect on men. Chocolate and
floral perfumes were among those with the least impact.
Unlike the blood-flow reductions measured in the women in response to
certain smells, however, no odor inhibited male arousal.
Dr. Hirsch acknowledged that the study results cannot be applied to the
entire population because the research did not take into account variations
of age, ethnicity or sexual orientation. The participants were both single
and married, had normal orgasmic function and none were taking medication at
the time of the testing.
The power of aroma in the sexual arena is hardly a new phenomenon. Sigmund
Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, declared early this century that
maintaining a civilized society depended on people repressing their
olfactory senses. If those were unleashed, Freud predicted, people would be
walking about constantly sexually aroused.
The Chicago researchers developed several possible explanations for the
sexual olfactory responses they recorded, most relating to the psychological
association of smells, a response associated with Pavlovian conditioning.
Certain smells may have reminded a participant of their partner, thus
eliciting a sexual response. Other odors, such as a childhood candy, may
evoke a nostalgic response, elevating mood and increasing response to
external stimulants. Certain odors may also act directly on the brain to
diminish anxiety, a natural inhibitor to sexual desire.
The smell of cherries, for example, may discourage arousal because of its
association with medicines and cough drops.
The researchers initially tested 30 scents, ranging from floral perfumes to
bubble gum. The sample was then narrowed to the fragrances producing the
most significant responses.
Those who participated -- after a considerable recruitment effort on a
Chicago radio station -- were exposed to surgical masks impregnated with
certain scents.
In the women, vaginal blood flow was measured with a tampon-like device
while the subjects sequentially wore eight surgical masks impregnated with
odors and two blank masks that served as controls -- applied in a
double-blind, random fashion.
The same methodology was used on the men, whose penile blood flow was
measured using a device similar to the tightening band used for taking blood
pressure on a person's arm.
Whatever turns you on
Dr. Alan Hirsch of the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation
led a study that initially looked at the impact of various aromas on female
sexual arousal, measured as percentage change in vaginal blood flow. A
summary of a few of the most telling examples:
Good & Plenty (black licorice candy) combined with cucumber +14%
Baby powder +13%
Pumpkin pie combined with lavender +11%
Baby powder combined with chocolate +4%
Perfume +1%
Men's cologne -1%
Good & Plenty -12%
Charcoal-barbecued meat -14%
Cherry -18%
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Bumsy:
I have been on the list for a while now, and have read everything you guys
say with great gusto. Never really got to use it, as I was and still am in a
relationship (yes, SS helped me into the relationship, a classic case of get
the girl you want!). But I wondered whether it would work, I am now in New
Orleans and decided to put some of this stuff to the test at a few local
strip clubs.
Cruised for a while and then went to Rick's, probably one of the better ones
and played out the cards....I have to tell you guys I struck out twice and I
figured that they would tell all the other girls and I'd get squat, but I
think they were too busy to bother and ended up with one *hot* girl totally
entranced and asking me to come to her place after she got off, WOW, I was
impressed by the stuff on the list that was so true and the SS methodology.
While I read it I never figured it would work, but the real world shows
otherwise!
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Ross:
>Kitty:
>"I don't agree. Pointing out to a girl that her spindly fingers remind you
>of ET is great! Just don't pick on breast size, ass, legs ... NECK is ok
>too.
>Another ET crack! Truth is, if you CAN pick on a girl's breasts or ass,
she
>ain't a 10 and you shouldn't be NEGGING anyhow."
Ha ha ha. I LOVE that neck crack! Especially for a long, elegant,
lean chick..HA HA HA. "Has anyone ever told you, your neck reminds
them of ET?"
(Commenting on Mystery's comments):
>Dude, man ... I'm MYSTERY : ) You think I was born in a bubble and don't
>know about SS or something ... dude ... I'm ... MYSTERY. What a stupid
>debate this is. You say that SS is the be all and end all. I say it
>isn't. I say, if you don't have ANYTHING, it's GREAT. If you are a pro
>pua, though, you will have discovered OTHER ways to score. The mental
model
>of SEDUCING a WOMAN by making her FEEL GOOD is ONE model.
With respect, Mys, that is ONE part of SS; along with setting the
frame that powers her to respond, and other elements I don't care to
get into.
> Another is to
>SYSTEMATICALLY CONVEY a mysterious persona and look for indicators of
>interest.
That last part is key for YOU; I've talked to guys who have met Mys
and he's a very good looking guy. So he can afford a more passive
approach because, RIGHT OUT OF THE CHUTE HIS LOOKS ARE GOING TO GENERATE
SOME INTEREST.
Mys, where would you be without your looks? A person who's met you
describes you as "gorgeous" and no, he isn't gay. So, can we really
accept that what you say is going to work when it does NOT rely on
languaging to get past looks, as SS does?
> Most importantly, for
>me seduction isn't about turning a woman on by stripping her of power
>(although I realize sometimes this works for people). I believe in turning
>woman on by helping them to discover, appreciate, and savor power that they
>never knew they had. I think neghits are a subtle form of supplication
>because you only need to knock her down if she is above you.
Touche', Halbster. PLAYFUL neg hits, just as a bit of spice,
obviously meant as a joke, to keep her from taking herself and you
too seriously are fine. ANYTHING done with meanness, however, does
reflect a need to knock someone down to YOUR level. Right on, Mike!
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GameMaster:
I don't know if you've read Wendi's book (http://www.wendi.com/) yet but I
think she may have solved the riddle of what you and I were talking about
and why sometimes things don't work as they should. My 5 Star
recommendation. Her advice on rapport building is absolutely essential from
a woman's perspective. This woman is the fucking BOMB!!! And she's got a
great sense of humor too. I'm betting she's a Sag.
That's the first book I've read about seduction that was written for
men by a woman. I'd say she's coming from an expert position. There's
stuff in there I've never considered....you'll love it!
BTW, she has the most hypnotic and sexy voice I have EVER
heard. I'm having a great time listening to these tapes! They are
incredible. Wish I'd found her years ago.
> Linda: The anger women have is unbelievable. I should know
> because I was one of them! But that's a topic for another list...
>
> Anyway, for all people, men and women, anger is a normal reaction to
> rejection. Ross or someone here must have plotted the stages that guys go
> through as they develop their SS skills. Perhaps anger is one of the first
> stages...all this anger is what probably motivated some of them to do
> something about their situation with women in the first place. What I've
> seen from the more experienced and masterful SSers is the prevailing
> attitude of having a good time and enjoying the company of a woman (or two
> or three) instead of anger. In other words, once guys learn more SS, it
> seems they become less angry and more successful. It's a phase--if they
> continue to learn SS they let go of some of that baggage.
GameMaster: Good point Linda. Anger is absolutely my prime motivation, but
enjoyment without expectation is the objective. And I find the more I let go
of any preset expectation in a relationship, the more I enjoy myself, and
probably the more anger I let go of at the subconscious level which probably
benefits my success. But anger, properly channeled can become a passionate
driving force to master these skills.
>Kitty:
> Having said that, I do agree that some women are far too full of
themselves,
> and do need taking down a peg or two. Can I ask you to please define for
me
> what makes a woman a "10", a "5" or a "2"? I'm just curious, is all, and
> interested to see how much opinions differ.
>
> And yes, I'm fully aware I sound like a giant hypocrite : )
GameMaster: There ain't no such thing as a 10. I have known several 9's in
my life that always sooner or later proved that they had a big ole' fucking
hole in their head thereby rendering their status to the negative column.
My boy Dave for example only hits on what he thinks are tens...but after
getting to know them I'll ask "Negative 5000?" You got it. The answer is
we don't know what makes a 10 to one guy and an 8 to another - it's purely
subjective. I personally think it's how a person makes you feel that's more
important than anything else. You may be amazed what happens when
you only allow your scale to reach #9. Check out the book "Semi-Tough" by
Dan Jenkins if you want to learn what that attitude is all about. "No such
thing as a ten Hoss!"
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Dwayne:
Last week I sarged a HB at the local gym... she made a date to come to
my place to do a photo session as part of her aspiration to become a
fashion model. When last I spoke to her, she said she "feel very
excited" over the upcoming date.
Two days later, I get three back-to-back e-mails from her saying she
made a mistake and was changing her mind. When I saw her at the gym she
made a beeline for the locker room and hid out there until I left.
Whahoppen? Ink wiring minds want to know...
My Comments:
Obviously until you ask her you will never know for certain. But here are
my thoughts:
1) She may have asked around about you and gotten a negative report
(happened to GameMaster recently with an HB he met who was all excited about
having met him, then she found out about his rep and cancelled)
Dwayne Responds:
Well, I just joined the gym and nobody there knows me... I hadn't spoken
to or approached any other women there, staff or members.
My Comment: Well, as long as she knows your full name she could have asked
her girlfriends about you. I have had blind dates get turned around on me
(women I hadn't even met didn't want to meet me, clearly based on what
someone must have told them which I have no idea what they said or why) for
no reason at all. The problem here is you just don't know what someone is
out there saying about you, whether you deserve it or not. (I didn't deserve
it, BTW.)
Dwayne Responds: True, that.
I don't know specifically who it could have been... But it is definitely a
possibility.
My Comments on his original question continue:
2) You weren't clear that this was a date and she got mixed feelings about
coming to your place under false pretenses. I personally find that unless
you are 100% clear that this is a date, they get uncomfortable, suspicious
of your intentions, and will cancel, flake or otherwise bail.
Dwayne Responds: This makes sense... except that she simply said she
"suddenly realized" that this was something she didn't want to do... But I
hadn't approached her about it since we agreed on the date, so obviously the
wheels in her brain were cranking.
My Comment: This is my choice of what happened. It would only make sense
to you if it was a possibility -- in other words, if it was absolutely clear
you would have corrected me immediately. The rest of her reactions could
follow any pattern, it is just a question of when it hits her.
Dwayne Responds: She *did* make the obligatory use of the term "my
boyfriend" during our conversation... But I didn't do a boyfriend killer or
anything... Just ignored it.
My Comment: I think it was mixed signals -- now you mention that she has a
BF and you don't deny that it wasn't crystal clear that this was a date so
her getting uncomfortable is pretty much a standard reaction.
My Comments on his original question continue:
3) Buyer's remorse, that unexplainable sinking feeling that she's made a
mistake and there's no real reason other than it doesn't feel right.
Because there's no reason is part of the reason that she ran away from you,
as she would have nothing to tell you.
Dwayne Responds: The story of my life. A friend calls it the Boudreaux
syndrome...
The story goes a man name Boudreaux had a life of trouble and misery.
He cried out to God why his life was such a disaster. A voice came from
the sky, "I don't know Boudreaux... Something about you just pisses me
off."
My Comment: I don't believe in that. I think you have the power to make
your own luck, not that I have mastered this or anything. Getting women
takes a lot of practice, it doesn't just happen.
Dwayne Responds: Sounds funny, though...
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