mASF post by "secondarysight"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, June 6, 2004
Have you guys considered the fact that you might actually be getting better
with women? Imagine that! This is a subject that has been difficult for me, so
I am going to discuss it.
I didn't lose my virginity until I actually began to believe that I was good
with women. And I mean actually believing it and acting congruently with it,
instead of just qualifying myself to myself. This was an amazing feat,
considering that I was a highschool virgin with 5 LJBFs under my belt and 10
months on ASF. I had gone for years with chicks exhibiting zero attraction to
me, so I had been dealing with doubts from day one. I couldn't just magically
make them go away. But as I slowly ceased to believe them and stopped letting
them dominate my thinking, chicks started responding better and better to me,
eventually resulting in me losing my virginity. Coincidence? I think not. Let's
see if any of these sound familiar:
"What if all this 'PU' stuff is just a lie and I should go buy some roses and
chocolates? I should probably go apologize to all those chicks I busted on.
They probably think I am a jerk now."
"What if I am just a 'keyboard jockey' after all?! I am just fooling myself. I
read things online. I write things online. I use a keyboard to do so.
Therefore, I am a keyboard jockey, and keyboard jockeys just spout theory
without actually being in the field!! I suck. I am all talk..."
"I am just an r...A...F...C!!!!!!! That means I am only 'recovering'!!! I am
not supposed to be good with women yet, so I need to 'improve' myself more. I
am not actually worthy of women at this point...My body language is probably
shit. Yes, it must be, an rAFC like me can't possible have good body language.
And sometimes I still feel nervous on approach, so I would be deluding myself
to think that chicks could be attracted to me..."
"This chick is kinoing me, sooo...it..umm...it MUST be a fluke!!! She is
probably insane or on crack or something. Or she is just trying to 'shit test'
me her with attractiveness? No way, a shit test would mean that she actually
might be attracted to me. Maybe this is just the time of the month where she is
extra horny, and she would do this to any guy. It can't possibly have anything
to do with me. No wait, she is *L.S.E.*!!! That's it. It's easy to use C&F to
get IOIs from LSE girls, so this is really nothing special...in fact what I am
doing is really basic and average. That because...I am average!!! I am just an
Average Frustrated Chump!!!"
"Chicks are starting to like me??!! WTF is this shit?! I am going to go beat
myself up now until presumptuous ideas like that go away. I don't want to be
one of those losers who thinks he is hot shit. In reality, chicks don't like
me. I am a *victim,* I tell you! I was conditioned to be an AFC by our fucked
up society. Yes, I am a martyr. I was fucked over by (depending on the day) my
parents, HBHighSchoolOne-itis, those nasty little kids busting on me in middle
school, my
height/weight/appearance/acne/shyness/introversion/intellectuality/nerdiness/niceness/caring/compassion/good manners/voice/body language. Waaah!"
"ASF is a place to train hopeless guys to be good with women. Chicks still
aren't throwing themselves on me and humping my legs, so that means I must be
SOOO pitiful that even ASF cannot help me!!! They could write a short novel
about my experiences as warning to other guys and a testament to how fucked up
society is. 'He was sooo downtrodden that even the best PUAs in the land
couldn't help him! He was the rAFC Jesus, crucified by our culture!' Chicks
would probably cry if they read it. Maybe they would try to come and give me a
pity fuck. No, the novel would *beta* me so much in their eyes that they would
still find me repulsive...I know, I can just put '--He tried so hard, but he
remained the rAFC Jesus--' on my tombstone. Then chicks will cry!"
"I have suffered so much. I could spend hours on ASF, and I could spend hours
in the field, but it still wouldn't make any difference because something is
always going to go wrong...and it's going to be my fault because I am a sucky
rAFC KJ wannabe! Wait, no! I am a *victim,* remember? My failures and struggles
are because of cruel circumstances that have been forced on me. Society made me
so BETA! I never asked for this! Why couldn't I just have been born as
AMOGStupidHead? I would probably be happier that way, even though he cannot
form complete sentences..."
"This chick just started kissing me! What the hell is going on? Chicks don't
kiss guys because they are passive and state based and have chick logic and all
that stuff. Even if they did, they wouldn't kiss me, because I am an rAFC KJ.
She probably just feels sorry for me because I tried to kiss her earlier and I
messed up the timing. Wait, we are making out...what is happening???" <---(at
points like this, the negativity starts to break down. It is kinda hard to
believe that a chick isn't attracted to you during a makeout. )
As I am writing these down, they sound really ridiculous, don't they? I am
exaggerating a little (but the short novel thing was true), yet it's amazing
how we still still say shit like this to ourselves everyday and actually
believe it. There is always going to be some sort of negative interpretation of
every interaction you have with a chick. But it isn't necessarily the correct
interpretation, and you don't have to believe it.
There is a lot of pressure on this board. That is because we have a commitment
to competence. You have to be "in the field." You can't be a "keyboard jockey."
This kind of paints the picture that success is only defined by being hot shit
here or by getting lots of lays. No. If you made EC with a chick today, and you
couldn't yesterday, that's improvement. That is success. If you received
reverse kino for the first time, then that is success. Why not celebrate it
instead of making up some bullshit reason why it is irrelevant and you still
suck with women? I am not suggesting that you try to delude yourself and give
yourself an overblown view of your own abilities. That is called "narcissism."
I am telling you to look at the facts:
If you can do something you couldn't do before, you are not the AFC you were
before. Simple as that. You are allowed to believe that you have left your old
identity behind. Now update your internal dialogue to reflect this fact, or
some day you will be beating yourself up for only having 50 lays and not having
any threesomes.
__________________________________
-"The only way to treat a woman is to make
love to her if she is pretty, and to someone
else if she is plain."
—Oscar Wilde
|
