mASF post by "Design"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, December 12, 2004I wanted to go out tonight, but almost didn't. I'm very state-dependent, and as
the clock neared 11:30, I didn't have my mental shit together. I was pretty
sure that if I went out at all, I wouldn't be able to do any approaches (and I
thought I was past that point!).
Finally, I forced myself to go out. I started at Ned Devine's, a local bar I
know well. Opened a guy to get my bearings, tried for an HB9 a few minutes
later, and crashed and burned badly. Mostly I crashed and burned because I
opened badly and couldn't recover. At first I thought it was because I was
unprepared, but upon reflection it's because (a) I used a shitty opener rather
than my tried and true routines, and (b) once things stalled, I focused on
material rather than dealing with the situation as it was. I'll have to spend
some time thinking about how I could have handled that better.
In any case, that really fucked with my mental state, and I wouldn't make
myself open any more sets. I decided to call it a night.
But on the way home, I decided to make a stop at Fast Eddie's, a bar near my
house. That was a good decision. I moved into a mixed group. "How are you all
doing tonight?" They accepted me, but I after a routine or two, I couldn't
really connect, so I moved on to another set: an HB6, an HB8, and two guys.
Things started well. The HB8 had almost no bitch shield, had just broken up
with her boyfriend, and was responding well to my cocky & funny approach. I ran
some routines, had her laughing, but something went wrong. I'm not sure what.
If I created attraction, and I think I came close, I fucked up somehow because
she turned her attention back to the AFC who was hitting on her, and I couldn't
get her to commit to coming back to my place (I invited her friends too). I
didn't even try a number close, because it was a guaranteed flake.
Here's my overall question: Right now I feel as though I have a bunch of tools,
but I haven't figured out how to use them effectively.
With that last set, I focused mainly on C&F, but also threw in some open loops
(which she didn't really respond to), some push & pull, and a few stories
designed to create interest. My thinking right now is that I need to focus on
structure. Rather than throw a lot of stuff out there, I need to get a grip on
what I should be trying to accomplish at each step, and how to deal with her
reactions, to keep the PU on track (i.e., moving FORWARD).
Maybe that's something that just comes with experience. If so, tell me, and
I'll just focus on doing whatever until I get that experience. But if there's
something more I can do, I'd love to know that. Or, if you need more info to
judge, tell me, and I'll provide it.
Design
--
Life By Design
http://designexists.blogspot.com
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