mASF post by "Vince"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, July 7, 2005...you may not like where you end up. Nothing fails like success. You can
pay now, or you can pay with interest later. An ounce of prevention is worth
a pound of cure.
Okay, I've belabored the clichés, but they're clichés for a reason: they
come true often enough to be good rules. If the whole point of your learning
this stuff is to get laid, fine. Just consider how wrong it can all go:
? You can contract an STD
? She may become pregnant and go after you for child support
? A jealous boyfriend may make life difficult (or even impossible) for you
? The words TEMPORARY RESTRAINING ORDER may become very familiar
? She may accuse you of forced sexual relations
Let me suggest that you go beyond learning to get laid. Instead, learn how
to manage this part of your life with skill and style. The whole man/woman
dynamic is way beyond doing pushups over an open manhole. Women are
wonderful - get as much as you can out of being with them.
If you are contemptuous of women ("Chicks are retarded!"), if you want as
many notches in your belt as you can get, if you think "Love 'em and leave
'em" is the way to go, that's your decision. Just know that you are denying
yourself the best part of being with a woman - fulfillment. It is satisfying
to have women in your life, if you don't already know that. You can't take
your game to the next level if it's a game where you do things TO women,
rather than WITH them.
Setting goals in seduction means knowing where you want to end up, and how
to get there from here. A clear path to follow makes a big difference in the
results you obtain. The guy who has taken control of this part of his life
is the guy who knows himself and sees his progress in terms of gradual
improvement. The guy who wants to jump ahead to the best part will discover
that life is not like a porn video. You can't fast forward to the juicy
parts without risking the above bullet points.
Any set of goals you select for yourself should include your expectations
for the ladies involved. Managing her relationship expectations is a subject
I've harped on to new guys who are going crazy with snagging all the babes
they can. Invariably, some guy, besotted with his power to get them
attracted, horny and willing to mix it up, fails to manage expectations.
Then he's got a married woman teaching her kids to call him daddy, a girl he
really doesn't want around all the time is around all the time, or any other
variation of uncontrolled attraction leading to aggravation.
Guys have actually posted on the newsgroups about how neat it would be to
have a stalker. It's all part of a scarcity mentality. Some guy who, up
until now, couldn't get women to do more than reject him sees the
possibility that he could actually get one or more to become obsessed with
himself. He thinks it'd be cool to have a chick follow him around and beg
for scraps of attention.
Hopefully, if you're reading this, you are past the "kid in the candy shop
with a $50 bill" stage of dealing with women. If you are not, let me do you
a favor. Don't carry the stage of fucking with women past the point where
you start to get intimate. Yeah, if you're learning, by all means, break
their hearts because you won't ask them out. But if you have intimate
relations with a woman and you still deal with her as an object to be
mistreated, get professional help for yourself.
Manage her relationship expectations to conform to how you intend to behave
after you both have sex. If you're looking for casual relationships and new
possibilities, don't tell her she's the only one. I'm belaboring this point
because I've seen too many guys end up with chicks that are far too attached
for their own good. Again, it's evidence of a scarcity mentality. Guys keep
chicks on a string because they're afraid, deep down, that they'll fail to
find another.
Rather than be a shitty player, improve your skills so you NEVER have to
worry about a dry spell again. The goal to set for yourself is to master
each of the stages of connecting with women, from "Hi" to "Why, Debbie,
without your clothes, you're naked!" Every guy should at least familiarize
himself with the GUNWITCH METHOD, q.v. Most highly skilled PUA's won't need
to rely on getting lone wolf women to fuck them, but the rAFC should have
this in his toolkit. Sex with a new woman builds confidence, no question.
Just make sure she understands, and can handle the fact, that it's casual.
The goals you pick for the medium and long term are up to you. In most
cases, guys want to end up with one really cool chick. Pair bonding is
normal for humans. Speaking from experience, monogamous relationships are
wonderful, as long as they work. Since you now have the ability to be the
one who chooses for himself what kind of woman you want, rather than
settling for the kind of woman that chooses you, choose a winner. Along with
beauty, blowjob ability and big boobs, pick the ones that have intelligence,
common sense, few neuroses and a self-reliant attitude.
Vince
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