mASF post by "DavidCopafeel"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, May 5, 2005May 22, 2005
Went to Traffic on Crescent alone
Dress – really cool – peacocky a bit – beige blazer with the collar turned up.
Funky blue shirt not tucked in. Cool jeans and a pair of beige and red runners
from France that I bought recently. Listening to some cool funky music in the
car to get pumped up and vowing to open sets immediately even if I had nothing
to say just to get warmedup.
1.
HB4 standing at bar alone. Op:No matter how many of these things I come to they
always play the same cheesy music. Like -that song- I heard all throughout high
school and this song (new song comes on) – oh I think we’re finally up to like
university frosh week.
HB4: laughing, kinoing a bit
2.
(HB8.5 and HB7.5) both seated. – Op: Hi how’s it going? (Stood in front of her
without sitting yet – she told me she (alias=Julie)was from Belgium and that
her friend was from France(alias=Adriana). We spoke but it was pretty loud so I
motioned that it might be easier to talk if I sat down.
Julie: I go to xyz university
Me: What do you study?
J: human relations
Me: Oh so you don’t really get along with people naturally so you have to study
it
J: (laugh)
Me: Yeah you seem kind of difficult.
J: (look of surprise)
Me: Don’t worry I think you’re doing pretty well.
J: (smile)
Me: Actually it takes a lot of courage to admit that you aren’t good at
something and then study it
(I think she asked me what I did – I said “doctor” Her face became more
transfixed on mine at that moment. I wanted to say something else - DYD style –
like I’m a hand model - I know that being a doc can definitely be a plus but I
like to avoid it sometimes because it often leads to the same boring old
interview style of conversation.)
Fluff – we tried to continue speaking but it was too loud so I said “let’s go
sit over there” She agreed and we got up. She walked behind me. We went to the
back. There were 2 seating areas – 1 was full of people, the other completely
empty. I walked in to the empty one and started to sit down. She was not behind
me. I came back and she was held up by someone she knew for a few seconds. When
she saw that the seating area was completely empty I think she became a bit
hesitant and said she wanted to find her friend. She went back, found her
friend. I went to the bar and opened another set.
3.
Me: Can you believe that with this ticket they’ll give you vodka but they won’t
give you tap water.
HB6: They have water
Me: No - ‘tap’ water
HB: Well if you want tap water you came to the wrong place. I like vodka.
Me: Oh well I had my vodka already – now I want water
Then I turned away and saw Julie and Adriana. I reopened them and lead them to
the seating area. We sat down, with Julie in the middle. Then Adriana left
fairly soon after, leaving me and Julie alone. I did some good C/F stuff and
good kino. We were playfighting a bit. She was serious a lot of the time –
wanted to talk about serious things. I said ok lets talk serious but then I
started to tickle her and we started playfighting some more.
Me: It’s so loud in here
J: I know
Me: Look if you go seduce the DJ, I’ll slip in and turn the volume down.
J: (look of surprise, slight grin)
J: How old are you?
Me: (hesitating, looking at her) Guess
J: 26.
Me: (laughing) – no
J: OK so how old?
Me: Guess
J: I already guessed!
Me: (not saying anything and laughing at her) – I’m 31
J: How many years did you study to be a doctor? (and more basic questions about
me)
Adriana returns
Me: It’s pretty loud in here
A: Yeah
Me: If you guys go and seduce the DJ, I’ll…etc…
Both: (look of surprise)
Me: 2 women can seduce a guy no problem – and I’ll turn it down.
Adriana leaves again.
J: (said something about dancing)
Me: if you could dance and pretend to be any animal which one would it be?
J: a cat
Me: How would you dance – show me.
J: (looking confused)
Me: (doing some imitation of how I think a cat would dance and then a monkey)
J: (laughing with a “you’re crazy” kind of look)
Me: So go dance
J: what alone?
Me: OK so come dance with me
J: OK (gets up – I put my hand behind me but she does not take it – either she
didn’t see it, was carrying too many things or didn’t want to)
Arrive on the dance floor.
I grab her hand and hold her around the waist and start dancing with her some
salsa moves that I learned at Club Med. There was a lot of kino but I should
have held her a bit closer. Then the song ends after 30 seconds. We walk out
on to the balcony and again comment about how loud it is. I walk to the end of
the balcony and she is slow to follow. Some guy looks at her and tries to make
prolonged eye contact with her. She looks back a little bit. I’m not at all
worried because he didn’t open her with anything.
J: Did you come here alone?
Me: No I came with two gorgeous girls but they’re in the bathroom right now.
Geez they’ve been in there a long time (tapping my watch). Well they’re
probably talking – you know ..women.
J: (looking at me slightly surprised and confused with a grin – I hold her gaze
and start laughing.
J: What’s your last name?
Me: Gee such personal questions you’re asking me – next you’re going to ask me
where we should get married.
J: (turning away – looking surprised and confused) It’s not really that
personal but OK if you don’t want to answer.
Me: What’s yours?, etc.....
Her cell phone rings – she talks for a few minutes. I start talking to a guy
next to me about how they always overplay the same songs and how loud it is.
More fluff – I was starting to get a little tired so the CF was getting less
effective.
Adriana comes back and start they talking about how loud it is and how maybe
NewTown might be better. I said “Yeah NewTown is nice”
They eye code or at least try to but I was looking at them the whole time so
they were just staring at each other for a long time. Finally I look away for a
few seconds. Julie asks me “Are you staying here?” I say “No – let’s go to
NewTown” We leave the balcony and go to NewTown. At this point I’m feeling even
more tired and so although I ‘m not feeling inhibited, my lines are probably
just becoming very fluffy and not too clever.
As we walk in I say “Ahh this is way more civilized – more suited to beautiful
European women and a guy who wants to be from Europe” I walk up to a table but
then I change my mind thinking that the kino will be much better if we can sit
at the counter or bar. From here the conversation dies a bit but I hold the
dominant frame (eye contact, dominant body posture, etc….) and pull it off.
They start talking about how they are meeting some guys here later. Then one of
them asks if we wouldn’t rather sit at a table. I say “no it's too hard to hear
each other” Anyway we go to sit down but I walk in front and take the lead so
it appears that it is like my idea. We sit, then talk a bit. Then the guy and
his friend arrive. Julie was supposed to meet this guy – her aunt set her up
and gave him her number. He called her up. He was 22 and just finished
university. He was a nice cool guy, fairly relaxed and easy going. Julie and I
talk on /off. There is no apparent tension between me and this guy. We aren’t
competing and I’m not trying to blow him out. I actually think the guy is
pretty cool and easy-going so I talk to him a bit. I have no problem getting
Julie's attention when I want to. I pretend there is something on my hand. I
get up and Julie moves my chair slightly closer to hers after I’ve left the
table. I get a napkin and wipe my hands but then I go on the other side of
Adriana and crouch beside her chair. She adjusts her body to turn more towards
me. When I start to slide my hand on the backrest of her chair, she leans away
from me a bit and then crosses her arms. I don’t take my hand away. We have a
fairly intellectual conversation – not much humour. Then I say that my feet are
hurting from crouching and I go back to my chair and sit down. Julie and I talk
a bit but I'm too tired to really keep up the convo. Adriana looks at me
looking at my watch and she looks at hers and says that she will be going soon.
I say that I am going back to the club. I ask Adriana for her email. She gives
it to me. Then Julie asks me for my number. I give it to her and she puts it
into her phone. Then I say “I know when you give a girl you’re number she
usually doesn’t call – gimme a call” She replies” Well you never know what
might happen”. I take her hand and do the two-cheek kiss thing. We do it rather
slowly, making me think that she liked the prolonged contact. I do the same to
Adriana and then shake hands with the two guys. Julie says to me “I’ll probably
come back to the club too”
I leave and go back to the club.
I walk in feeling tired but still confident. I walk to the back of the club,
making eye contact with a few girls on the way. I go to take a piss and chat up
some guy in the washroom.
I walk back out and see a girl who gives me EC.
4.
Me: Your lips glow in the dark
HB6: laughs
Me: Hey I know who you are (recognising her from internet dating site)
Her: really?
Me: IS your name so-and-so
Her: Yes – what’s yours?
Me: (my name)
Her: what’s your alias on (internet dating site)
Me: (my name)– I don’t have one – guys don’t have to lie about that stuff
Her: My real name is so-and-so
Me: Yeah – I recognize the smile and the hair
Her: (turns away a bit – not sure if she wanted to keep talking. I said a few
more things but she never turned her entire body towards me again only her
neck.
Me: It was cool meeting you.
I walk on to the dance floor and see 2 girls in the corner who were looking in
my direction and pointing at me (I think). I walk up to the taller better
looking one
5. HB6, HB4
Me: Hey how’s it going? I can’t believe that they keep playing the same music
at these things. (I’m practically yelling in her ear because it so loud)
HB6: nodding
Me: this music is perfect to do the white man dance to (I imitate the white man
dance – biting my lower lip and moving very stiffly – girl doesn’t look
particularly amused)
Me: Yeah – you’re doing it perfectly (HB6 smiles slightly – her friend comes up
to me)
HB4: What happened?
Me: nothing
Me: (going back to HB6 – hey you’re like the coolest girl I’ve met in the last
fifteen minutes – walk off)
6. HB5, HB7
Me: Hey – how’s it going
HB5: (looking apprehensive) Hi (turning away)
Me: fluff about music being crappy
HB5: moves away
HB7: We’re together
Me: You’re lesbians?
HB7: yes
Me: prove it
HB7 takes her friend and kisses her on the lips for a few seconds. The HB5
looks really surprised and uncomfortable.
Me: Cool
HB7: You want to see tongue
Me: Yeah
HB7: Well she‘s shy do it in front of her brother still.
Me: Yeah she is shy.
Fluff
Me: OK either what you just told me is the biggest crock of shit or the coolest
story I’ve heard all night.
HB7: smiling
Me: You’re like the coolest girl I’ve met in the last half an hour.
7.
HB7 standing by herself next to the dancefloor
Me: I can’t believe you’re not dancing to this incredible music (sarcastically)
HB7: nodding
Me: Hey what’s your name
HB7: alias=Elana
Me: Hey you don’t look Jewish but I won’t say anything(it was a jewish party)
HB7: (replying in a defensive slightly pissed off tone) I am Jewish so you
don’t have to say anything.
Me: You have a great sense of humour!
HB7: You’re very sarcastic
Me: No seriously you are like the coolest girl I’ve met in the last 15 minutes.
HB7 – grabs her friend and turns away
8.
HB8.5 blonde, HB8.5 brunette
Me: Hey how’s it going?
Them: OK
Me: Hey are you guys best friends?
Them: yes
Me: It ‘s funny – I knew that cuz when I came up to say hi you both had exactly
the same look on your face and you even have the same smile. I wish I could
adopt you as my little sisters.
(Still facing me)
Me: (stalling a bit) Where did you get those earrings they’re nice?
Brunette: I bought them…(pausing) – in my father’s store
Me: you’re father has a store?
Brunette: (nodding)
Me: Wait your father has a store and you had to still had to buy them?
Brun: No I just say that so I don’t have to tell people that my father has a
store
Me: Why - is it a secret?
Guy comes up to them and takes their picture. I turn away, feeling like I’m
getting tired and stalling more often – i.e the mojo is wearing off.
I go and sit by the bar.
The HB7 from set#6 sees me and smiles and raises her hand and starts dancingin
my direction with full eye contact. I smile, rasie my hand and go up and hi-5
her. We lock hands. Then she is right up against me with full body contact.
Me: (blah blah)
HB7: OK my english is not very good so you’d better talk slower or speak
French.
Me: Ok (in French now): I think tonight is the night that you and your
girlfriend should come out of the closet in front of her brother.
Blah blah
Me: Are you bisexual?
HB7: yes
Me: Would you say most lesbians are bisexual?
HB7: (said something but it was too loud to hear)
Kino was good. I should have said something like “If we kissed in front of your
girlfriend would she get jealous?” Instead I went back to rapport and started
telling her how I just returned from France and told her some mildly amusing
story about the store clerks there being very surprised when you asked them
“How are you?”. She was mildly amused but then left to go to the bathroom. I
think she was ready to kiss judging by the body contact but I turned down her
buying temp a bit and broke her state so she walked off. I didn’t wait around –
I walked off and reopened Elana.
Me: Hey Elana – since we’re almost kind-of-friends – I wanted to tell you that
you are a really good dancer (said sarcastically)
Elana: I have a boyfriend – (pointing to her boyfriend – at this point I did a
no-no – I actually got a little pissed off with her and pretended like I wasn’t
trying to pick her up. )
Me: Thanks for telling me – did I ask? ( I should have said something like
“sorry I’m not into threesomes with other guys” or “ I’m so happy for you – you
seem kind of difficult – so I’m happy that you were able to find someone.”
I came back and stood by the bar. The HB6 from set #5 reopens me
HB6: Are you from Montreal?
Me: yeah
HB6: oh – we’re from Toronto
Me: oh I’m sorry
HB6: (turns away)
Me: I used to live in Toronto – has the place livened up at all? (don’t know if
she heard me so I repeated myself – she answered something but I don’t think
she heard me – whatever – she was pretty lame – I rolled my eyes and turned
away)
Then I left the club and went home feeling really good.
Overall
Successes
Set #2 – definitely the best set. I isolated the HB8.5, got good attraction and
kino, extracted her from the club, she number closed me – logistical problem
because of this guy she had prearranged to meet. But she gave me some good
indications that she was interested.
Set#6 – HB7: good kino, she reopened me
Also, I had no fear at all and no outcome dependence. Learning that the things
that lead to attraction are different than the things that make a girl want to
go shopping for a minivan and babyseat with you.
Sticking Points:
When I get tired I tend to lose my playfulness and C&F frame quickly and the
sets stall and I eject. I think a lot of my game is based on this and so maybe
I need something else to fall back on when I get low-energy. Maybe some
routines.
(2 hours, 8 sets)
I'd appreciate any feedback from the more experienced PUAs.
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