mASF post by "TylerDurden"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, November 11, 2004Many of you guys reading this have never met another person from the community.
I would encourage them to give it a try. It's worthwhile. That's how I went
about it. I travelled and met everyone who was around about two years ago. I
think I met absolutely every guy, and took really close note of how they worked
- both in PU and in general social interaction. Most are no longer on ASF, but
I took what I could from my generation of guys.
About two years ago Papa started promoting and stocking the lairs, and they've
grown substantially with the help of many other great guys. We're at a point
now where a lot of guys met their best friends through the community.
The good side of this is that like-minded guys who are self-improvement geared
have a chance to meet up. Guys like that are really rare. Most people that
you talk to have ego-blocks that prevent you from talking to them openly and
honestly. They're more preoccupied with keeping their frame than they are in
having a genuine conversation. But guys in the community know eachother's
bullshit, so they can be really open with eachother.
The down side, however, is that many guys came into the community looking to be
around more girls but wound up getting the opposite. They got used to hanging
around with guys all the time. Really, that's fine. But something that occurs
to me is that for a lot of guys, the means becomes the end.
With RSD, I will tell my longer term girlfriends about it. They are cool with
it, and I can talk game openly in front of them. Many of them will even sit in
the background or even wing the guys while I work out in the field on a
program.
But the biggest problems come up with the LINGO stuff. Like, guys will say to
me "She's cool with it?" and I'm like "Yeah, its fine."
From there though, they mistakenly think that "cool with it" means to say stuff
like "Yeah, I number closed this girl from a set where I stole from an AMOG,
and I'm going to f close her if I can get past her LMR. I built attraction
until I had mad IOIs."
The girls will look at me really turned off, maybe a bit disgusted, like I'm a
weirdo. I had one girl who would joke to me all the time like "Hey closer"
because of something that someone said. On my own end - and this doesn't apply
so much for other guys as for myself - I tried with RSD to make it really
classy, to represent my group properly. The website is a PU tool, as many of
you guys probably noticed. It has an "about us" section on it that works as a
personal add, and pictures that make girls go "This looks so awesome". I can
show it to my family and business associates, and it is legitimate. Many of my
girlfriends read my archive, and because I have abstained from the whole "kiss
and tell" thing with lay reports, I don't have to worry about "getting caught"
with my archive and having to remove it, as many top PUAs have.
In my posts, I've tried to move away from a lot of the lingo, although it has
some uses. I still use it at times because it is a habit, but I consciously
try to avoid it because the habits of my writing will carry over into my
interactions. It is especially bad when I speak at RSD or DYD, where so few of
the guys have ever heard of ASF and I sound more like a cultists than a dating
expert.
To me, a jargon that is fine is something like "Social conditioning" or "lead
the interaction" can be fine. But something more jargon-y is better avoided.
Anything that sounds like you're trying too hard is better avoided.
In addition to all of this, I hang out with some of the coolest natural guys,
and I would love to send them to this chatboard. But the whole vibe on this
chatboard is often really uptight. Guys who get girls have a cool way of
talking and don't get emotional or upset about anything.
A few months ago I challenged myself to make everything that I posted here
funny for like a straight month. I teased guys like how I tease my friends at
home. I know that there are a lot of tough guys on here that are not to be
fucked with and all that, but I think that lightening up the vibe with some
humour is more representative of the attitudes and vibes of real players. I
would never imagine guys like Toecutter or Juggler or Mrsex4uNYC posting "This
post isn't advanced enough" or "This isn't well explained enough!" Real
players don't care about this stuff - the emission quality of what comes out of
their mouth doesn't allow for that kind of stuff. They just joke around and
make sharp observations to push up the vibe. They're confident that they can
add value to the vibe with their own stuff, so rather than wasting time posting
something like that, they'd just allot that time to post something cool.
I was talking to Cliff from Cliff's List, and he said that nobody in this world
will ever agree with everything that someone else says. Just take the good
with the bad and learn what you can from the parts that you think are good.
It's impossible to form an opinion of someone's personality from over the
internet. You don't know the people who are posting. Trying to tell things
about their character from over the internet isn't realistic. So if you
disagree with something, instead of posting some intense emotional stuff,
consider that posting in a light hearted funny way (even busting or aka
"A-M-O-G'ing" on the guy a bit) is more representative of player mentality than
is the more typical way.
Other attitudes that I can see as not being constructive are the "us vs them"
attitudes. I've seen more shit from girls than you can imagine - I see stuff
day in and day out. But I try not to think about it in that sense. There's
just no point. Honestly, I think that guys think this way out of frustration,
and that its not representative of how they actually feel about women. You can
see it when a girl walks in a lair meeting, and the guy looks all guilty. I've
done this myself when I first started, so I know how it feels.
Anyway, overall I think that it would be cool to integrate our more natural
selves into our community selves. I guess for guys who don't meet up in real
life, they can do whatever they feel like doing. Obviously, ASF is a place
where guys can talk openly and however they want. But one thing that Twentysix
taught me was that the habits that you cultivate in terms of your thinking
patterns will really get carried over into your real life. So being congruent
to what you want to project here has benefits to what you project over all.
I also think that lifestyle and more open posting is more congruent. That's
why I post about a lot of non-PU related stuff. As time goes on (if I keep
posting here), my posts will have less and less content. I have already posted
all of my content in a 3000 post archive and have little else to add. On the
Lounge, the focus is lifestyle based, and integrating your natural life into
your game.
For more advanced guys, you will learn more from just looking at a sharp guys'
thoughts on random stuff, than you will from his content. It is more
interesting. You see the whole game already from top to bottom, so learning
more about a top guys' personality and lifestyle is more helpful. I don't want
to see this board a beginner's board. I like advanced posts. For a nerd who
doesn't get girls, a post about lifestyle or philosophy won't be progressive.
But for an advanced guy it is. That is part of coming full circle. When you
start, a girl is a girl. Then a girl becomes an amalgom of ASD, IOIs, LMR, BT,
etc.. Then........ she becomes just a girl again. The same goes for focus on
lifestyle and all that stuff.
I want to make another post about that at some point soon, because that is a
direction that I think this board could go in that would make a lot more
progress than with our current M.O.
-TD
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