mASF post by "Pap"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, October 10, 2003[I've been traveling for quite awhile and returned to university now...so I'm
catching up on field-reports...as I've been only posting in the Lounge and
P-L-A-Y (LA List)...but I've been going out every night and will write FRs
daily...and I may post here again as I love the Game]
PAPA’S QUEBEC ADVENTURES WITH MAFIABITCH
Episode 1: (The First Night with MafiaBitch)
2:30AM: Papa’s Unsuspected Meeting of MafiaBitch
After the Montreal Mystery Workshop, I went with Mystery, No9, and TylerDurden
to Cliff’s Montreal Lair Meeting and then I went to Cliff’s to get my baggage
ready to take a bus to Toronto. However, we didn’t realize that the last bus
was at midnight. So TD and I decided to go to an afterbar and wait it out until
7:30am for the next bus instead of returning to Cliff’s house and waking him
up.
The taxi-driver in our cab to the bus station told us about a club called Aria
that was supposed to be open until 7am. So we went to the Crown Plaza Hotel
across the street from the Montreal Bus Terminal and checked our baggage in the
lobby by pretending that we were checking out of the hotel. Then we walked to
Aria. It was pretty difficult to find Aria.
As we walked down the street, we walked by several bums, yelling crazy people,
and prostitutes soliciting everywhere. I felt like we were going to get jumped
by someone and robbed any second. We asked to chicks that looked like
prostitutes in front of a sexcoteque (porn cinema) where to find Aria and they
blew it off. We were about to give up, but we found two normal looking AMOGs
that told us where to find Aria.
When we get to Aria, TD and I saw a group of 6 guys and 1 girl standing in
front of the closed club. Arghhhhh. I am getting extremely frustrated and
pissed, but I don’t want to wait 4 hours to go to the Bus Terminal on these
horrible streets. I have been dealing with the massive stress of workshop
organizing and pressure of needing top form pickup performance in front of
other people ALL the time, and it was getting to me.
So TD and I start talking about what to do and we get interrupted by a girl.
Supposedly, TD talked to the girl earlier and talked about her friends earlier
and said they were boring and he labeled her as a typical French Canadian Girl.
HB: Hey, have you seen the Matrix II.
Papa: Yeah. It’s cool.
She continues talking and telling some story-telling. I feel like she just did
an indirect opener on me and she is macking me.
I’m thinking that she must be some hustler. She is kinoing TD and I and talking
to all the other guys also. Some of the guys ditch her and she is talking to
all of us saying, “Guys, someone come to Red Light with me. Please take me
there. It will be sooooo much fun.” I’ve heard a lot about the Montreal Sex
Industry so I’m thinking this girl is a stripper or prostitute promoting a Red
Light District Club. Well, that’s my introduction to MafiaBitch. I’m thinking
to myself, “Fuck. I don’t want to deal with this shit, but going to a Red Light
District Strip Club would be a helluva lot better than standing on the street
for 4 hours around the bus station with all the street vigilantes roaming
around and waiting for trouble. So TD and I agree that we should check it out.
I flag down a taxi cab and I get into the cab with TylerDurden and MafiaBitch.
TD asks me to ask if one of the other guys wants to get into the cab with us to
make the cab cheaper; however, after I ask them, none of them decided to join
us. So we take off in the cab with the chick and tell the cab driver to take us
to Red Light. MafiaBitch says the club is only 10 minutes away in Laval, an
island off Montreal and I think she is lying and that it has to be much
farther. My mind is thinking that she is probably some prostitute or stripper
that wants to hook us up with some ghetto whores from the island Laval’s strip
clubs, where I hear that American visitors frequent to fuck cheap hot French
whores. I hear TD and her talk to the cab driver about Red Light and TD tells
me that it’ll be a normal club. I’m hoping that it’s not a strip club, but my
doubts were not laid to rest yet.
I noticed that MafiaBitch is talking a lot. She also starts talking to me. She
says a lot of C&F comments and I tell her that she is a bad girl and a bad
influence.
Papa: [mild body check to dance music]
MafiaBitch: bla blab la
TD: Oh, this girl is like Celine Dion.
MafiaBitch: Hahahaha.
Papa: Naw. More like Britney Spears. Uh, oh. Look out.
MafiaBitch: [light punch to my armi]
Papa: Owwwwww. That’s my weak arm. [light punch to her arm]
MafiaBitch: Hey, you are going to give me a bruise. [she punches my arm again]
Papa: [I punch her arm and exchange blows until I just stop and hockey body
check her lightly]
After 30 minutes of taxi-driving, and ball-busting between me and the chick, we
get to Red Light. It appears to be a large warehouse in the middle of nowhere.
MafiaBitch gives us $20CAN for the taxi and jumps out of the cab. That’s more
than her share cuz the cab was only $15. We enter the club and MafiaBitch asks
me to pay the $5 cover charge (for girls) and I agree because she overpaid the
taxi. I then pay my $10 cover with TD.
MafiaBitch: Will you please stay with me in the club?
Papa: Sure.
MafitaBitch: Yes. Don’t leave me until I find my friends.
The coat check person wanted me to check my jacket, but I walk past into the
main area and see a loud techno-style dance club. It’s a rave party. MafiaBitch
is nearby and she wants to roam around. She had been giving me IOIs all night
and I’m thinking that this girl was very sexy. Suddenly, a security bouncer
pulls me aside and says I need to check my coat. So I tell MafiaBitch to wait
and pay my $2CAN to get my coat checked.
TD pulls me aside and wants to talk before I go into the main room to meet up
with MafiaBitch.
TylerDurden: Dude, what are your objectives here, man? This club is way to loud
to sarge. So is your objective here to fuck this girl [MafiaBitch]?
Papa: Well, I’m just here to have a good time, but yeah, I’ll fuck her.
TylerDurden: Well, I want you to tell me what your objectives are because you
are either going to chill with her the whole time because if you let her out of
your sight, she will party with someone else and you will lose her…or you will
sarge others with me.
Papa: Well, let’s stick with her for now and see what happens.
I go into the main dancefloor area and look around for MafiaBitch. She is
dancing happily on a platform. I grab for her to pull her off the platform and
she kneels quickly to get ready to hop down and I accidentally grab her breasts
and then pull her off the platform. She smiles, grabs my arm, and does a cute
semi-twirl hip-hop movement. Then she grabs my arm and starts walking.
MafiaBitch: I wanted you to see me dance sexily up there for awhile.
Papa: [smiles and thinks ‘yeah, baby…you are mine.’]
We walk around the main dance floor, which is a loud dance floor in the middle
of the room with a walking area around the dance-floor in the rectangular room.
At the other end of the dancefloor is a bar. I grab a bottle of water and see
MafiaBitch go passed the bar to a staircase upstairs. I turn around and look to
see if TylerDurden is around and I think that I lose them.
MafiaBitch: [stops walking and turns around to face me] Come upstairs with me.
I’m going to look for my friends.
We look around and I’m hoping that she doesn’t find her friends because it’s so
much easier to sarge this chick without having to occupy the obstacles in this
loud club. We walk up and down the couches upstairs looking for her friends.
She doesn’t see them so she goes to the railing to look at the dancefloor
below. We chit chat for a little while staring at the dancefloor. Suddenly, she
does a happy yelp and runs down the stairs.
Papa: Hey Superkid! What’s up?!?
MafiaBitch: [already halfway down the staircase stops, looks up at me with an
empty stare] Nothing. [then she continues]
Papa: [confused, I walk after her as she rushes back onto the dancefloor]
Suddenly, I see TylerDurden walking up the staircase in the opposite direction.
TylerDurden: Dude, what’s up. Don’t fuck that chick. She’ll be trouble.
Papa: What? Cummon. [thinking I better hurry up cuz TD told me not to let me
out of my sight in this 3000 person capacity club because I’d probably lose
her]
TylerDurden: You don’t want to hookup with her. She's a raver chick?!?
Papa: I dunno.
TylerDurden: This girl will only be trouble. Don’t get involved with her. These
raver chicks are trouble. Don’t fuck her.
Papa: Cummon, man. I know what I'm getting myself into.
TylerDurden: Hey, man. That’s right. Just because you fucked girls that were
part of her group, it’s ok. That’s right.
Papa: Cummon, dude. [looking towards the direction of MafiaBitch because she is
almost out of my sight]
TylerDurden: Sorry to cockblock you man, but I just don’t think it’s a good
idea for you to get involved with that kind of girl. But if you do, that’s
fine. But let it be a lesson to you because I’ve been involved with girls like
that.
Papa: She wants to hookup. She opened me.
TylerDurden: Yeah. I know. That’s the only kind of girls that would get with me
back when I was an AFC. I’d get with them because I used to go to this kind of
environment all the time. It’s bad shit, man, but I’m not going to stop you.
Papa: Ok, man. [and I head my way down the staircase to look for MafiaBitch]
I walk around the techno-dancefloor all around and don’t see her. Then I go
through a passage way into a lounge with flashy lasers everywhere and can’t
find her. So I go into a hip-hop lounge and look for her by walking around the
dancefloor and through the dancefloor a couple times and don’t see her
anywhere. I see a big white security dude bobbling back and forth to block
people from going into a room with a staircase.
I walk by the dude, nod my head and walk right by him. I’m thinking that this
room must not be very special (not VIP) cuz he let me in without checking for a
stamp or anything. Upstairs, I see few people and two rooms, one of them with a
massage table, but nobody getting a massage…and definitely no MafiaBitch. So I
decide to go downstairs one more time to search.
I see TylerDurden and go up to him to chat.
TylerDurden: Dude, how long do you want to stay here?
Papa: Well, we have 3 hours before the bus.
TylerDurden: Yeah, but I don’t want to sarge this loud club.
Papa: It’s better than on the streets waiting. Cummon.
TylerDurden: Mmmm. Hmm. Well, ok. I guess this lounge is ok.
Papa: Let’s open that two-set over there.
TD and I go into the hallway nearby because we are very close to the girls and
we gave them proximity and we thought that it’d be too much of a SOI if we
opened them right away. We chill for a few minutes and then I go towards the
2-set because TD and I are about to open them. We sit down on a platform next
to them and TD tells me to just chill and let’s open them the “natural way”. TD
sits next to the set cuz I want him to open.
While waiting I look around and by coincidence, I look to my other side and
sitting right next to me is MafiaBitch.
Papa: Hey. There you are. I didn’t think I’d find you.
MafiaBitch. Yeah. I can’t find my friends.
[chit chat proceeds and we are getting into wide rapport and obviously the girl
is attracted so I’m thinking that I have a guaranteed lay]
TylerDurden: Hey, dude. I am going to get out of here. Are you staying or are
you coming with me? I don’t think you should get involved with this girl…and
the lay isn’t even guaranteed.
Papa: Hey, bro. I’m staying.
TylerDurden: Alight, man. I guess I’ll just go to Toronto and you give me a
call and we’ll work out how we’re going to meet up.
Papa: Sounds good, man.
TylerDurden: Ok. I’m out of here.
Papa: Aight. Cheers.
I continue talking to MafiaBitch and then we decide to talk around the
danceclub and we dance a little. I don’t get dirty or freaky with her because I
don’t want to exhaust her or get her all sweaty so she won’t be too worn out
for sex. Some of the people dancing around us are really sweaty and one guy’s
sweaty arm brushes up against MafiaBitch’s and she says, “Ewww.” Then we
continue dancing and then walk around.
We see the dudes that were near Aria and we chat them up a bit.
MafiaBitch: Those were your friends, right?
Papa: No.
MafiaBitch: Oh, I thought they were your friends?
[I think they might have been her friends from Quebec City]
Then we decide to go upstairs through the door with the white buff security
dude and we walk right in and upstairs. The front room is the bar room with
couches and the back-room has a lounge area. We chill in the lounge area on a
couch by the bathroom. I’m thinking there must be a lot of people using drugs
in there and dealing around the club (I later find out that the club just
opened up cuz it was shut down for awhile).
We spend the next hour doing the standard comfort-building stuff…talking about
who we are, age, and other get-to-know each other stuff…mixed in with a lot of
push-pull, qualifying, C&F role-playing, and some demonstrations of magic. I
also do some patterning and demonstrations of value using some routines that I
created using my Sony Clie.
MafiaBitch ends up wanting to smoke a little and I want to get a caffeinated
energy drink like Red Bull. So I standup and go to the bar and get an Energy
Drink and a package of matches for MafiaBitch. When I return to the Lounge, she
is talking to some dude. I decide to freeze her out. He ends up pulling out a
lighter and smokes and she joins him to smoke. She looks at me and grabs the
pillow next to her and put it behind her head.
I’m thinking that this girl is freezing me out now; however, I had already
developed attraction and wide rapport for the last few hours so I am not too
concerned. I freeze her out and look around the dancefloor. I chill on the
couch just chilling and drinking my Energy Drink thinking she might eject soon.
I decide to get 3 more energy drinks and go back and forth between drinking and
ordering, and walking between the two rooms.
The freeze out wasn’t enough so I decided to start chatting up chicks. All the
chicks in the room spoke very little Engligh [unlike MafiaBitch who speaks
fluent English and French] and after a difficult to understand opener on all 4
girls that I chatted, I had to ask “Do you speak English?”. They would all
reply “No” or “Very Little”, but I wanted to continue talking cuz MafiaBitch
would see me do it and I’d get social proof.
I basically spent 5-15 minutes chatting fluff with each chick, but I remembered
Cliff telling me that when you speak English to these primarily French-speaking
Quebec chicks, you’ll get more respect from them even if they won’t like it as
much. So I reasoned that these girls just liked talking to a foreign exotic
American boy about California and whatever.
This still wasn’t enough. So I decided to get another Energy Drink and return
to the room. I end up sitting down on the couch across from some AMOG friends
of the dude that is talking to MafiaBitch and decide to chat them up. I ask
about the time and then inquire about the club. I find out that the room I’m in
is for VIPs only and that the reason why I’m let in is because everyone in the
club thinks the few Asians in the Club are Triads. He also tells me that most
of the club is Gangbangers, Drugdealers, addicts, hustlers, and Quebec Mafia
Biker Dudes. When I ask how he got in, he just says he knows all the security
and I leave it at that. Suddenly MafiaBitch comes over with the AMOG and asks,
“Do you wanna get out of here?” I say, “Sure.” Then we go downstairs and sit on
a leather bench and chat.
We chat for a little bit and then she starts making fun of some of the people
sitting on the platforms in the club. I take out my Sony Clie and run Gaydar on
them and she laughs. She then ends up playing with Gaydar on many other people.
I show her Xenoprobe and my photos and funny videos (video of Mike with Gorilla
stuffed animal…and Mike with Owen on his back). She plays with the Gaydar and
chats with me for a couple hours.
At 9am, the lights turn on and we go outside of the club. Outside of the club,
the sunlight is bright and I put on my red sunglasses.
MafiaBitch: Hey, let’s go look for my friends. He’s fallen asleep in his car.
Papa: [I’m hoping NO so we can just go to a hookup location whether at her
place if she has a place or a hotel] Naw…let’s just grab a cab.
MafiaBitch: Just a second.
We look around all over the parking lot and don’t find her friends so I call a
cab and tell her that we should go out front. She takes out a flier and gives
me the address and I tell the cab to meet us at the club. When we go out to the
front, MafiaBitch sees her friends’ car and wakes them up and tells them that
we called a cab and that she was going with me in a cab.
The cab driver comes by right at this moment and I wave at him and he makes a
motion as if he is going to turn around. Mafia Bitch gets her bags out of the
car and comes with me into the cab. I tell the taxi driver to go the Crown
Plaza Hotel across the street from the Montreal Bus Terminal. MafiaBitch used
to live in Montreal so she helps guide the taxi driver to the hotel in French
along the way.
MafiaBitch: That was my ride to Quebec. They treat me bad. Ow. I got this
bruise.
Papa: Well, stick with me kid and we’ll go a long way.
[Papa sways to music back and forth across the car…I do this in every taxi we
get in, but the last night I do this she exclaims… “oW. You are rough.”…I’ve
been doing this ever since some chick from NASA Academy-Harvard was doing this]
We chat a bit with some C&F, but very light teasing because we are in RAPPORT
right now. Then I decide to qualify her.
Papa: You know, when I first met you I got the impression that you were a wild
party chick, but you know, now, that I’ve gotten to know you, I think you have
a great energy. I really like your sense of humor, C&F role-playing, C&F
frames. You see, I’ve found that living in LA for awhile, I’ve seen that beauty
is common, but rare is a positive outlook, a good attitude, and a great sense
of humor. And you’ve got that great energy.
MafiaBitch: [smiles and swoons]
We chat a bit more and then she says:
MafiaBitch: You know, this is for fun. I’ve got a Moroccan boy back in Quebec,
but when I’m in Montreal, I’m partying.
Papa: Ok. Sure. [we are very near the hotel]
MafiaBitch: Yeah. My boy back home is soo great, but we fight too much and
sometimes I just like to have fun.
Papa: [I launch a bunch of patterns based on TD’s BF Destroying language
patterns to refrain the dude as a nice guy and to turn all his mysterious
behavior into framed insecurities] Yeah. Well, you know, he probably is a nice
guy, and he just feels like unleashing all his frustrations and anger on you
sometimes because he’s afraid he’ll never find a girl as good as you. So he’s
afraid of losing you, but deep down inside, he’s probably a nice guy.
MafiaBitch: Yeah. Well, we have such great times together though, sexually. And
he has an amazing face that just turns me on.
Papa: Well, you know, he sounds like just another nice guy. He probably gave
you a lot of peaks and highs and he’s scared that he just can’t create those
tender amazing moments again and so he acts out of insecurities, but deep down
inside he’s just a nice guy.
MafiaBitch: How old are you?
Papa: 23.
MafiaBitch: No way. Show me your ID. You are so mature, too mature for being
23.
When we get to the hotel, I go to the lobby of the hotel and get my luggage.
MafiaBitch is waiting with her backpack by the hotel elevator.
Upstairs, I tell MafiaBitch:
Bla bla
Papa: You know, I was really lucky because I was about to leave at 7:30am and
now I’ve met you.
MafiaBitch: Yeah. We should stay together and get to know each other now over
the next week. I’ll be anything you want me to be…and right now, I’m easy.
So I lean in and kiss her and we have sex. It was amazing and I felt sooooo
relaxed afterwards, where we took a hot shower together and washed each other.
I felt sooo fantastic. We stay up all night talking and listening to music and
around lunchtime, the adventure continues. I also get her to dress up for me
and video tape her and take her pictures. Damn, she has such a hot body.
Whooooo! I love the Game.
PAPA’S QUEBEC ADVENTURES WITH MAFIABITCH
Episode 2: (Chilling with Pickup-Artists and Ex-Boyfriends)
Around lunchtime, MafiaBitch started calling lots of people on the hotel phone.
She called her boyfriend to let him know that she will not be home for a few
days because she lives with him and said she is staying with a friend from
Microsoft (because I told her that I was the president of Microsoft as a joke).
However, she also called 3 of her ex-boyfriends who were in Montreal. She even
put me on the phone with them.
The weirdest thing was that she actually gave the hotel room to the guys, which
weirded me out. I didn’t want angry boyfriends and ex-boyfriends knocking on my
door while I’m fucking their girl. One of her ex-boyfriends flew from Brazil to
marry her and she shot him down; another bought a gift overseas for her; and a
third one invited her to a party. The strangest thing of all of this was that
she actually said that WE would go party.
I started to freak out, but I didn’t want to show it. However, I called
backup…Mystery (who was chilling with No9 at Doc’s house). I wanted us to meet
up. So I explained peacock theory to the girl by telling her that it’s better
to be looked over than to be overlooked, and we should go shopping for funky
clothes together with my friends. She loved the idea and said peacocking was
now her favorite word.
We leave the hotel and meet up with Mystery and a bunch of guys from the
Montreal Lair at Doc’s sweet crib. Then Mystery, No9, and I go to a private
room and leave MafiaBitch talking to some of the PUAs. I tell the boys about
the night before and tell them that I want them to help me out as backup just
in case things get out of hand at the party with her ex-boyfriend. They said
they’d roll with me.
MafiaBitch, Mystery, and I decide to go shopping with MafiaBitch, and she
bought some funky clothes. I didn’t really like the shopping very much, but she
sure looked hot. Mystery helped her pick out clothes to make her look all hot.
He told me that he gives her a 9+. Then we buy a bottle of champagne to bring
to the party and decided to walk towards her ex-boyfriends’s house. We get in
there and her Asian ex-BF opens the door.
At the party, I isolate MafiaBitch for awhile on the balcony, but eventually I
befriend all the friends of the ex-boyfriend. One of them knocks over the
bottle of champagne by accident and apologizes and brings us a new bottle.
Mystery does some magic in front of the ex-boyfriend and MafiaBitch and the
dude says that he is the guy who talked to him on the phone and that we wanted
to talk to him about workshops (cuz I mentioned them).
He backs off and I talk to Mystery for a bit, who wanted to ask permission to
sarge MafiaBitch cuz she is so hot. I said, “not this time, bro” so he said
“ok”. Then, MafiaBitch, Mystery, MafiaBitch, and I decided to jet and meet up
with Doc and his HB10 GF for dinner. After dinner, MafiaBitch and I went to Old
Montreal and walked around and chatted.
While in isolation with MafiaBitch, I told her that I wanted her to travel with
me and be my international pivot and pickup chicks together while traveling
around the world and around Europe. She’s very social, hot, and likes other
girls so I thought it’d be great for threesomes. I do a lot of variations of
TD’s BF destroyer to destroy all the objections she’d bring up.
MafiaBitch: That’d be soo cool, but you know, I am soo happy in Quebec City.
Papa: Yeah. I guest it’s cool, it’s nice to be in Quebec. You have a
nice…SIMPLY…quiet…lifestyle…it’s satisfying…it’s simply
comfortable…STABLE…predictable…you know, when you want to have a good time, you
can go party in the corn fields…but it’s nice and cool.
MafiaBitch: You don’t know what you are asking of me. I have a boyfriend there.
Papa: You should break up with him and roll with me, babe.
MafiaBitch: You can’t understand what we have together.
Papa: He sounds like a nice guy.
MafiaBitch: Yeah. We have problems. I don’t like how he treats me sometimes,
but he’s not the guy I’m going to marry. We have amazing times together.
Papa: Well, he sounds like a nice guy. He probably just seems like he’s not
that kind of guy that you could settle with, but he’s probably a pretty
predictable, stable, and nice guy that will buy you dinner, buy you flowers,
and take care of you.
MafiaBitch: No. He never buys me anything, but he is amazing. He’s the shit!
Papa: Once you get to know anybody, he is a nice guy. He probably just acts
that way because some people are energy leeches and although they give you good
times, you don’t want to hang out with people that bring you down. That’s not
cool. But he sounds like a nice guy.
MafiaBitch: Yes! That’s it. I don’t like energy leeches. It’s just that he’s
all I got in Quebec City.
Papa: Yeah. Well, if you roll with me…you can help me with my workshops. Quit
your job and join me on mine [I told her everything about the community and
workshops].
MafiaBitch: I need to think about this.
Papa: Yeah. Well, you have a nice lifestyle and job. It’s stable…or you could
roll with me on a spontaneous adventure. But it’s the spontaneous things in
life that truly makes life exciting. I just need to know that I’m with a girl
that wants to be with me in every way.
We decide to leave Old Montreal and go back to our hotel. I wanted to go chill
in the Jacuzzi, but it was closed. So we head back to the hotel and I want to
watch a movie and have sex in our hotel, but she wants to go out with her
friends because her ex-boyfriend is DJing. I don’t want to spend anymore time
with her ex-boyfriends. She then makes a call tells me that he ex2 is
downstairs and she wants to have coffee with him cuz he haves a gift for her. I
don’t like the idea at all and tell her to stay. She says NO and that she’ll be
gone for only 30 minutes. However, I fall asleep and when I wake up, she was
still gone. I call Mystery and meet up with Mystery, Kojak, and No9 and tell
them what happened. They think that she may be scamming me cuz I lent her some
money to buy some clothes and she said she’d pay me back in the morning, and
she still had the hotel key. They believe that she’ll go to the hotel while I’m
not there and may steal my stuff. I don’t believe them, but we decide that I
should checkout either way and move to Kojak’s.
So we go to the hotel and I put my key in my hotel room door and it doesn’t
work. WTF?!? I’m not too concerned though and when I go downstairs, the front
desk told me that they change the hotel room key everyday. So I check out, grab
all my stuff (and hers) and go to Kojak’s house. The only problem is that I
have no way of getting a hold of MafiaBitch and she can’t get a hold of me.
Well, I have a conference call with the SF and NYC Lairs so I call Cliff (from
Cliff’s List) and invite him to join the conference and ask if I can crash at
his crib cuz he has a super-sweet pad. He says sure. So I grab all my stuff and
MafiaBitch’s and catch a cab towards Cliff. Suddenly, I have an idea! I tell
the cab to make a detour to MafiaBitch’s ex-BF to find out if she might be with
him.
As soon as I roll up to the house, I see the ex-BF. I say, “Dude, where is
MafiaBitch?!?” He doesn’t answer and just gives me a strange look. Suddenly, I
hear a voice yelling, “PAPA!!!” and MafiaBitch jumps into my arms. I hold onto
her and throw her into the taxi. Then we drive to Cliff’s house. We get there
and I introduce Cliff to MafiaBitch. I show her around the pad and joke about
how it really is my crib.
I tell Cliff to call NYC/SF to get us on the conference call while I throw
MafiaBitch into one of the bedrooms, rip off her clothes, and leave her naked
on the bed, saying, “Babe, I’ll be right back.” She tries to stop me, but I
leave the room and get on the conference call with Cliff. I hear MafiaBitch in
the other room, but I want to at least get a few minutes on the phone cuz I
promised the boys.
Papa: Hello. TD can’t join us cuz he’s fuckin some girl right now, and I’ve
only got a few minutes cuz I have a girl here too.
THE NYC LIST: Hey.
Cliff: Hey guys.
Marco: Let’s get into Q&A. Anyone want to start off…
NYCDUDE: I have a question…do you leave messages when you call girls.
Cliff: [explanation of how MTL will call a girl and say something like, “Hey
Girl, the most interesting thing happened to me…I was walking down the street
and [click, hang up the phone]. It is a great tactic cuz the girl will call
back and say that the message got cut off and that she wanted to know what
happened.
Papa: [I agreed with the message tactic and said that I usually don’t leave
message] Guys, I really gotta go soon. [noises of girl in background and me
thinking that I’d rather be having sex with a hottie than answering basic
questions about the Game] There’s a naked girl yelling at me in French in the
background and I’ve really got to run.
Cliff: [she enters the room] And here she is.
Papa: Uh oh.
I grab MafiaBitch and take off my clothes and start making-out with her and
sucking her tits and she gets says that she is upset. I continue making out
with her and say, “Yeah. I really shouldn’t kiss you here [while kissing her
nipples] or here [while going lower]…that’d be bad…just plain wrong…she’s
laughing. I continue this process for about 15 minutes with backturns and
rollbacks when she starts bitching again.
Eventually, I use Jlaix’s line, “I wanna lick it…I wanna spell the alphabet.”
And then, I sing the Alphabet while licking her pussy as if spelling out the
alphabet.
MafiaBitcH: Ooooo. You don’t know how good this feels!!!
Then, we have sex again.
I wake up. She goes immediately to the bank to pay me back for the money I lent
her to buy clothes and apologizes for not coming back. She ended up chilling
and smoking with her friends all night.
Papa: I was worried that I’d never see you again and that’d I’d have all your
stuff cuz I didn’t have any way to get a hold of you. It was such an amazing
coincidence to have found you while driving by in a taxi. It’s amazing. Even
just meeting you randomly by a club the first night we met. It’s like we’re
getting just swept away…like it’s just meant to happen by all odds.
MafiaBitch: Yeah. It’s sooo weird. It’s too much for me. Are you spying on me?
I won’t care if you are.
Papa: Hahaha. No. Of course not, kid. You are so silly.
Then, we ended up having lunch and chilling at the Jazz Festival with Cliff.
Some random guys tried to pick her up while I got a phone call by saying, “Hey,
you are so beautiful.” It was so pathetic. She told me about what he said and I
simpy replied, “Hmmm. Nice of him.” We had a pretty good time, and she had to
return to Quebec City for work so I brought her to the bus station and kissed
her goodbye.
PAPA’S QUEBEC ADVENTURES WITH MAFIABITCH
Episode 3: (Do You Love Me, MafiaBitch?!?)
After returning to Montreal, I took a midnight bus to meet up with MafiaBitch.
The unfortunate thing was that she didn’t know what time I was arriving and my
cell phone wasn’t working in the area. So I walked up and down the bus asking
to borrow a mobile phone to call my girlfriend until I found a random guy who
said I could. However, when I called, she didn’t pick up the phone.
Papa: Dude, she didn’t pickup the phone.
Dude: Bummer.
Papa: Can I call again in a few minutes.
Dude: Sure. Whatever.
Papa: Thanks, bro. You know, I am going to Quebec City and I am supposed to
meet this girl and I can’t get a hold of her and it’d really suck if I don’t
cuz I have no place to stay and don’t speak French.
Dude: That sucks, man. You know, I just came from Montreal and a similar thing
happened. I met some stripper chick. Hot stuff! And she wanted me to visit her.
Well, when I got there, she never answered my calls. Now, I’m going home and
never met up with her.
Papa: Fuck! That sucks, my man. Anyways, this is her number. I hope she doesn’t
do the same with me.
Dude: WTF?!? I recognize that number!!!
Papa: What?!?
Dude: Yeah. I think so. Wait, does she have red hair?
Papa: No. She is a brunette, but she did dye her hair.
Dude: Oh shit, dude. I hope it’s not the same girl.
Papa: Why?
Dude: Cuz the chick I’m thinking of is a crazy bitch from hell. I hope it’s not
the same girl because that’s what all my friends called her because she is
straight nuts. She likes Asian guys too and used to date [some hot shot rapper
dude].
Papa: Well, my man. Here’s a video of her. [showing her a video in the Camera].
Dude: That’s her!!!
We spend the next few minutes talking about her. There are very few Quebec City
people that speak English fluently supposedly so they all hangout and know each
other. I end up calling MafiaBitch and put him on the phone. They get into a
fight and MafiaBitch says not to trust the guy because he is scum. I told her
when I was getting into town and that we should meet up at a hotel.
When I arrive, she is nowhere to be found and she didn’t answer her phone. I
end up getting a hotel room and crash. When I wake up around 9am…I call her
again…and again…and again…persistence counts. The only thing is that she lives
with her BF so he picks up the phone, says HELLO and then hangs up on me saying
that MafiaBitch is not there. I call again cuz I heard her in the background
and convince MafiaBitch to come.
She arrives in a cab and we have breakfast together in my hotel and talk about
Europe and how she plans to leave her job, but she is afraid of leaving town
and her BF cuz he was so mad. We take off our clothes and fool around and take
pics. Pretty fun! However, after awhile, she starts to freak out and says she
wants to call her BF, who was freaking out and sad. I told her DO NOT CALL.
She starts to cry and I could tell she still has feelings for him. She ends up
talking to him against my will and I get pissed. They talk for close to an hour
on the phone and she says she feels better now because he told her it was OK to
travel around with me. I was kinda pissed at this point cuz I wanted her to not
call him and to just ditch him and break up with him completely.
Papa: I can’t do this.
MafiaBitch: Why? Cuz we fought and I called him. Fights are healthy.
Papa: No. It’s cuz I want you. And I want to be with you completely. And I’m
not sure if you are.
MafiaBitch: It’s just that I’m afraid that I might travel around with you and I
might miss my BF, but if I travel with you then maybe things will change.
Papa: If that’s the way it is, then there’s no love and I can’t have you travel
with me. This is the best way. [MafiaBitch looks sad] We have so much with each
other and you have so much going for you and I have a return ticket to come
back here so I know I will be back, but this is the only way that I WILL KNOW
for sure that you truly want to be with me [and not just for traveling the
world].
MafiaBitch and I had a heart to heart talk and made out with each other and she
tries to cheer me up cuz I will miss her, and she still wants to be with me so
she feeds me food and tries to put me into state by grinding the shit out of
me. However, I check out of the hotel and drive her to her job. On the way
there, I tell him, “I will MISS YOU sooooo much. It’s just that there’s no
love. And I feel for you.”
MafiaBitch: I love you.
I give her a hug and kiss…give her a half smile…and walk away.
…3 months later…
I am back in Montreal, and I get 6 phone calls for me on Cliff’s mobile phone
for me from MafiaBitch, she wants to see me, and for me to visit her. I decide
that there’s no time cuz I didn’t have much time. So I flew home to LA and she
calls me on my phone there saying she wants to visit me. I’m thinking of seeing
her again soon….I called her and haven’t spoken to her about plans yet. The
Papa/MafiaBitch adventure will continue.
Cheers,
Papa
http://galileo.spaceports.com/~papa/
http://www.realsocialdynamics.com
http://www.mysterymethod.com/papa.rox
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