mASF post by "Jimbo"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, September 9, 2004
Great post Vince,
you are always helping us in looking at the world with the right perspective.
Thanks.
Warmly,
Jimbo
On 9/19/04 10:51:10 AM, Vince wrote:
>As you become familiar with
>the tactics and strategy of
>getting intimate
>with women, the subject of
>appearance, clothing, scent,
>etc. will
>undoubtedly occur to you.
>However, until you get your
>head screwed on
>straight, dressing like a rock
>star, smelling like the next
>trendy
>fragrance, or having perfect
>hair will avail you naught.
>Not only that, it
>won't matter shit, neither.
>The same goes for pickup
>lines, flashy cars,
>tons of money and all the
>other surface stuff that AFC's
>think is just
>killer stuff to have when
>hunting the wild,
>full-breasted mattress
>thrasher.
>
>Make no mistake: peacocking ,
>canned material, clever games
>and such are
>used by the best of the best,
>and very successfully. The
>difference is,
>they have already mastered the
>basic mental and emotional
>skills that allow
>them to use these props with
>panache. "The right means in
>the wrong hands
>works the wrong way."
>
>The first thing you have to
>realize is that you don't
>know, in advance,
>what a given woman will like
>in a guy. That is, the cute
>little blonde
>cheerleader with the boobs you
>just met may only date black
>guys. Or the
>statuesque brunette you just
>spotted may have already
>decided YOU are just
>her type, despite the fact
>that her expression
>communicates boredom and
>annoyance. Never assume,
>because you can make an "ass"
>out of "u" and "me".
>By the way, if you are black
>and in the Scranton area, I'll
>gladly
>introduce you to the cute
>blonde cheerleader with the
>boobs. No, really!
>
>The first thing you have to
>realize about yourself is that
>most of what you
>assume you know about women is
>either wrong, mistaken or
>based on negative
>emotional experiences. If
>you've been repeatedly
>rejected by HB's, I'll
>wager you have preconceptions
>about them that are flat
>fucking wrong. No,
>you are not the type of guy
>who can't have a 10. No, she
>is not necessarily
>shallow, stupid and self
>absorbed because she's drop
>dead gorgeous. Just
>because ONE beautiful woman
>rejected you out of hand does
>not mean ALL of
>them will.
>
>I don't care what your excuse
>is; too short, too ugly, too
>poor, too
>handicapped, and too stupid.
>It really doesn't matter if
>you're willing to
>look past whatever you think
>is a shortcoming. I can say
>this with
>confidence because there are
>splendid examples of great
>women who already
>do. While it may not be the
>usual thing for you to see, I
>know you can
>think of at least one example
>of a seriously good looking
>woman who hooked
>up with a guy who was
>ridiculous. You know, the sort
>of guy who made you
>feel YOU would be a better
>choice for her than him.
>
>Life isn't fair - so take
>advantage of it! If you're
>waiting for someone
>else to even out the odds for
>you, you will wait in vain.
>The first step to
>take in improving your odds is
>accepting that what turns on a
>woman is in
>her mental/emotional being,
>not her eyes. Sure, chicks
>like cute guys, but
>they fall for Romantic Heroes.
>They fall for guys who stir
>feelings in them
>that are powerful,
>overwhelming, oceanic, greater
>than self. In short, they
>fall for adventurous,
>arrogant, cynical, domineering
>bad boys, who carry a
>scent of danger about them
>(thanx and a tip of the hat to
>Major Mark
>Cunningham for his description
>of the Romantic Hero).
>
>Now, if you are a nerd with
>greasy hair, a pocket
>protector and bruises
>from a recent drubbing you
>received from a bully, take
>heart. It only takes
>a few changes in yourself to
>change your persona into a guy
>who's "Mad, bad
>and dangerous to know." Seek
>out adventure. Try
>parachuting, bungee
>jumping. Buy a motorcycle. Do
>that which frightens you, and
>learn that the
>fear was in the anticipation,
>not the doing. Now, I counsel
>you to use
>common sense. Avoid
>confronting 6'4" carjackers
>with a psychotic streak
>(unless you absolutely have
>to). Stand up for yourself,
>even if it means
>you have to go against the
>common wisdom and defy your
>peer group. Learn to
>ask for what you really want.
>In fact, observe people who
>seem to always
>get what they really want.
>
>Learn how to deal with
>rejection. Just because
>someone says, "No", does not
>mean you cannot proceed to
>persuade him or her to say,
>"Yes." In fact, this
>skill can mean the difference
>between settling for second
>best and earning
>first place. Here's a little
>hint from those who are
>accustomed to repeated
>rejection: telemarketers.
>1. Agree
>2. Change subject
>3. Sell benefits
>4. Close
>Example:
>He: Wanna dance?
>She: Not with you.
>He: (1) I understand. (2)
>You've probably given up on
>meeting Mr. Right
>tonight. (3) A dance can be
>comforting, you know,
>especially if your
>partner makes you look good on
>the dance floor. (4) Feel free
>to change
>your mind [holds out his
>hand]. Join me [smile].
>
>Even the best PUA finds
>himself experience a momentary
>lapse of confidence,
>google, state or whatever you
>call being the cool guy. It
>may be lack of
>sleep; too much greasy pizza;
>red, red wine; she's too hot
>or whatever.
>Nevertheless, there he is,
>suddenly out of his element.
>He may not show it
>(the best ones don't), but
>he's lost it. The Brits call
>it "losing your
>bottle".
>
>As you get better at what you
>do, you'll attempt things
>you'd never have
>attempted when you were
>unskilled. This means you'll
>probably get in over
>your head, compared to what
>you used to be able to handle.
>Here's where
>state management saves you
>from reverting to your old
>self ("I'm not
>worthy!!!")
>
>First of all, you absolutely
>ARE worthy. She's only human.
>Even if you have
>to keep repeating it to
>yourself, she IS only human.
>You may be her first
>chance to be with a guy who
>won't fold under the pressure
>of her
>"wonderfulness". She's in
>luck. You're around.
>
>You need to apply some rules
>to yourself that may not be
>ABSOLUTELY true,
>in the sense of other people's
>perceptions of you. Fuck them.
>You are the
>best possible choice any woman
>you choose could make. Think
>about that.
>First, it's your choice as to
>whether she gets to be with
>you. Can you
>think of a time when a woman
>forced her attentions on you
>against your
>will, who was NOT your
>arresting officer or your
>mother, insisting you
>clean your room?! Therefore,
>if you don't choose her, she
>hasn't a prayer
>in the world of being with
>you.
>
>Can you think of a time when a
>certain person wanted
>desperately to have
>your attention, but you were,
>at best, indifferent to his or
>her need? I'll
>bet you felt free to fuck with
>them, knowing you could not
>drive them away
>by being a ballbuster. That's
>one kind of state you need to
>be able to
>recall at will. Whether you
>use NLP anchoring, operant
>conditioning,
>Pavlovian response or simply
>picture that person in your
>mind, practice
>recalling that feeling.
>
>Now go out in the field and
>find some HB's that would
>normally break your
>state of relaxed confidence.
>Recall that feeling. Approach
>said HB's and
>bust on them. Get used to
>believing that you can get
>back that state of
>mind and feeling at will.
>
>Now, perhaps you are already
>skilled, yet you still lose
>your "bottle"
>every once in a while. This is
>where you need to have preset
>methods of
>dealing with the temporary
>state of less-than-confidence.
>There are methods
>suggested by the material
>published by seduction experts
>and trainers, and
>I suggest you familiarize
>yourself with them. My
>personal method is to
>stop, assume my moody look of
>an adventurer who is
>remembering something
>from his haunted past, stare
>into the distance (the 1,000
>yard stare), then
>reacquire the target with a
>burning glance. Whatever you
>do, it must become
>a habit so that she doesn't
>catch you with a look of
>uncertainty in your
>eyes.
>
>Another point to cover is that
>the more attractive she is,
>the more likely
>it is that she is used to
>drawing other people into her
>reality. This can
>be disconcerting if you are
>not typically dealing with
>elite women. I can
>guarantee you; there are women
>out there who have NEVER
>encountered a man
>they could not control. You
>may have the pleasure and
>privilege of
>challenging her for the first
>time in your life. This will
>only happen if
>you are prepared to do so.
>
>The challenge for many of you
>will be dealing with a woman
>you formerly
>considered out of your league.
>Remember that's only true if
>you allow her
>to be. It may be a fact,
>however, that you have little
>experience dealing
>with this caliber of a woman:
>.90 caliber, the sort of
>big-bore beauty that
>shoots you dead from across
>the room. This is where
>synthetic experience
>may help.
>
>Your fieldwork will
>undoubtedly provide you with
>plenty of examples of the
>manipulative tests women
>subject potential lovers to.
>However, it may not
>just be the amount or
>intensity of the challenges
>you will face with the
>SHB. She may have moves you
>don't even see until you are
>doing things you
>had not planned on doing or
>are suddenly faced with a
>challenge new to you.
>
>More important than any canned
>response or premeditated move
>you have will
>be your willingness to
>actually walk away. If you
>even suspect she's trying
>to put one over on you, tell
>her it's time for you to go.
>Then go.
>
>Here is where State Management
>and behaviors intersect. You
>have to be able
>to feel that ejecting is no
>big deal. Believe me, it will
>show in your
>posture, your attitude and
>expression. While it may be
>'factual' that you
>won't have another opportunity
>to get with a goddess like
>this one any time
>soon, nevertheless, you must
>feel that this little Drama
>Queen is history,
>unless she shapes up in a
>hurry.
>
>You might have to rehearse
>giving her the boot. No doubt,
>she has had to
>shut down any number of guys
>at any level of intimacy,
>because she knew she
>could always do better than
>the current bastard before
>her. Go thou and do
>likewise. Imagine, in detail,
>telling her, "Gotta go now."
>"Too bad, you
>were doing so well with me..."
>"I don't put up with that kind
>of
>treatment." "I respect myself
>too well to allow you to
>continue with me."
>
>More importantly, you have to
>feel less than upset. You're
>Michael Corleone
>telling his sister, "If you go
>away with this man ... you'll
>disappoint
>me." You are dealing with this
>like any other minor
>annoyance, and you'll
>be over it as soon as you turn
>your back. You've stated your
>position and
>moved on.
>
>I can't emphasize strongly
>enough the need for every man
>to be a man when
>it comes to shit tests, no
>matter who offers them. A man
>doesn't lose his
>cool and start behaving like a
>child having a tantrum. Sure,
>he may growl,
>bark or show anger, but he
>never loses control.
>
>This part of State Management
>is more of a challenge for
>some than others.
>If your most recent fistfight
>was grade school and you deal
>with people who
>act out all the time, you're
>probably fine. If you tend to
>anger, have a
>short fuse or otherwise deal
>with frustration by exploding,
>you must learn
>how to cope without
>over-reacting. Remember that
>force of habit is the most
>powerful force in the
>Universe. Freaking out is a
>habit. Do what you need
>to do to break it.
>
>Finally, I should share with
>you how I move through the
>world. I do so
>generously. I even let some
>folks take advantage of my
>generosity,
>sometimes. I always have time
>to smile at a child, play with
>a dog or laugh
>for no reason. There may be
>times when I'm striding along,
>like a man with
>a mission, but I am also busy
>noticing what and who is in my
>environment.
>After all, it's MY reality,
>and I may be needed to tend to
>something
>important to me. No game is so
>important to me that I ignore
>either the big
>picture or the little things.
>
>Hope this helps.
>
>Vince
>--
>8===Ð
>
>
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