mASF post by "bish0p2004"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, April 4, 2004 All right, the reason I’m posting this is because I think I finally
understand how and when to use story telling…. maybe even patterning. Now,
I’ve had trouble applying this stuff to my life because it didn’t seem
congruent with who I am and I don’t particularly like story-telling, so I tried
to avoid it. But if it’s necessary, then I will learn it. So, although I’ve
read this in the players guide and on the board a thousand times, I still had
to have this part spelled out and written in my own words to truly get it. So
if this seems all too familiar to you, then I don’t know what to tell you
because I’m still gonna post it.
Anyways, this is an interaction that I had with a girl who I’ve wanted to fuck
for a while now. I’ve known this girl for a few months now, but up until now,
it’s all been fluff talk because that’s all I really know how to do. We’re
studying together at the campus, and I’m using some C+F (at least what I think
is C+F…I can’t remember exactly what I said, it’s not important anyway). Then
the conversation moves to cereal (which is still fluff talk I guess). All the
while we’re talking and I’m casually checking out random chicks that are
passing by, and I notice that she is casually checking out random dudes that
are walking by. At one point, she really looks at this one guy, and I’m like:
Bish0p: (smiling) damn, you liked that guy huh?
HB: (smiling) No. I’ve already seen him.
Bish0p: Yeeeaah right, you should go talk to him and get his number.
HB: No, he’s too young.
I can’t remember exactly what was said after this, but it was something
positive about young guys, in which she agrees and then I say something about
older guys:
Bish0p: but older guys will buy you flowers, and take you out, and have
relationships…
I really don’t know where I was going with that, or whether I was being
sarcastic or sincere, but the conversation goes into relationships. Again, I
can’t remember exactly how it went, but it was something along the lines of:
HB: I can’t be in a relationship right now, being in college and everything.
HB: I don’t see how other students can be in relationships either.
***I probably should have paraphrased her here, but, I’m wasn’t thinking about
this shit at the time…all I’m concerned about is keeping the convo going…****
Bish0p: Yeah, me neither. I couldn’t be in a relationship while I’m still in
college.
HB: I could see when I’m 31, out of school, and working… just not now.
-End- Yeah I know, exiting right?!
Whatever. Anyways, the convo ended and I think I now realize what I should
have done and I believe this is where story telling (even patterning) comes in.
I could have told her a story like this:
(I’m making this up right now)
Bish0p: I have this friend who is in the same situation that we are in. She’s
in college and doesn’t want a relationship. But, she’s human y’know…so she’s
still sexually active. So, she has a fuck buddy…somebody she sleeps with
without having to worry about any strings attached. But, it’s not just anybody
who she sleeps with; the other person feels the same way and they’re both cool
about it. They know that it’s not serious.
Bish0p: I think that’s cool that they can do that. I’d be all right with
doing it. How do you feel about that?
HB: Blah Blah
Then, what I’m thinking what you do next is, drop hints about you two doing it
together.
Bish0p: You know, we’re in a similar situation?
And just go from there with the hints (I’m really not too concerned with the
hints at this time, I’m more focused on the story telling aspect. Is that the
right time to start telling a story?
Anyways, is this right? Am I sort of on the right track? I’m going to check
the players guide later; I just wanted to get an actual person’s opinion on
this. Is this how a social interaction might go if you wanted a fuck buddy (If
so, then this is great because this means that I’m finally internalizing what
to do in these situations!) Is this how most interactions should go period?
-Fluff talk (some C+F, etc…)
-Personal/rapport conversation
-Story
-Talk about how I feel about story
-Ask her feelings about the story
-Drop hints about us doing it together (you know, we’re in a situation that’s
very similar to my friends)
Let me know, guys.
Later.
Bish0p
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