mASF post by "DavidCopafeel"
posted on: mASF forum: Reviews Discussion, May 5, 2005
I’m writing this review about 6 weeks after taking the course. First something
about myself. I’m 31 and have had my share of successes with women. I’d say
I’ve gotten laid more than average but I would not consider myself a natural
except perhaps in very particular circumstances and with particular types of
girls. What I have always lacked is a consistent ability to do cold approaches
and this was my goal with the bootcamp. I’m finding myself in a life situation
where I don’t want to date people from my work, and I’ve tried the internet and
met too many chicks who don’t look as good as their picture, so I decided I had
to learn how to approach women I don’t already know.
I have been told that my looks are above average and that I’m funny and
intelligent but until recently I had always lacked social intelligence (like
knowledge of the whole concept of status) and had been more of an introvert.
Both of these things had really kept me back even though I was excelling in
other areas. Having worked very hard on these things and having finally arrived
at a point where I felt like I could even attempt something like an RSD
bootcamp, I signed up.
OK now to the review.
During my weekend at the Project Hollywood mansion, I had the good fortune of
having Randy, Todd and Roxanna as my instructors. Geoff was out of town as were
all the other guys that I was hoping would be there (Tyler, Papa, etc…), who
were at a seminar. I have to admit that I was disappointed that these other
guys were not there after all I had heard about them. However, the experience I
had with Randi and Todd definitely made me feel like I got good value out of
it. There was also a “guest instructor” there named Alex who was a super cool
guy who I really got on well with. He would debrief me after my nights out and
give me great feedback. He was the kind of guy who was able to convey a lot of
personality and served as a good role model for just being a cool guy. He is
not an executive coach so he is not a regular but I think his goodwill speaks
to the fact that there are a lot of great guys in this community who will help
other guys out. There was also an intern there who was soft-spoken but very
cool.
There was one other student there besides me, a 19 year university freshman
from the East coast of the States. He looked very young and, like me when I was
nineteen, was a bit shy and unsure of himself. I almost didn’t recognize the
guy by the end of it – he had really undergone quite a transformation both in
his appearance and in his overall confidence.
Throughout the weekend, we were given lectures by Randy and Todd on every stage
of their 5-point escalation model, from opener to close with numerous examples
of each technique. We were also made to come up with our own examples on the
spot in front of them – e.g interactive value demonstration and stories.
The first night, we went out to a large open-air market. There Todd
demonstrated a set on a group of three girls and a guy seated at a table in a
fairly noisy area. Without hesitation he walked right up to the group, opened
them, got the whole group focused on him, seated himself eventually and held
the group’s attention. There were signs of attraction coming from some of the
girls almost immediately. The demonstration lasted about ten minutes. It was
very impressive! I had one complaint about the situation and that was that the
area was quite noisy and it was really hard to hear exactly what was being
said. I have no doubt that what was being said was effective because I could
read the body language of Todd and the girls but I wasn’t able to integrate the
routines into my auditory memory because I couldn’t hear them. The instructors
do a good job of demonstrating the routines during the lecture portion of the
bootcamp, but if you are an very auditory person like me I think it really
helps to hear them demonstrated in the field a few times in the moment. I did
have the chance to hear some of the routines when I went to wing with Randi. If
you can stand the slight discomfort of standing next to the instructors as they
run their game (because their game is really tight so it’s difficult to feel
like your contribution will be up to par) you will gain immensely by just
hearing them.
When the other student stalled which was probably a little more frequently
because of his relative inexperience, the instructors would step in to keep the
set going. Sometimes they pretty much ran the set from there on in. With me,
they stepped in less because I was able to keep things going more often. So on
the one hand, I felt good that I was getting enough attraction from some of my
sets to keep things going on my own, but it meant getting to watch the
instructors in action less often. I think this would have helped me a lot and
made the course more valuable. However, I think the instructors try hard to
strike a balance between demonstrating sets and getting you to run sets and
giving you feedback afterwards, but the emphasis is definitely on getting you
to run sets. I was relying on improv almost exclusively and found I had trouble
integrating a lot of the canned material into my sets – this was probably for
personal reasons and maybe because the material was so new to me. I was using
situational openers almost exclusively and was transitioning into rapport and
cocky/funny frames on a lot of my sets. I would get good feedback afterwards,
mostly on stuff like vocal projection and body language, mannerisms, etc.. What
I personally wanted more feedback on was stuff I was saying. I always wonder if
I’m being too sarcastic or making dumb jokes/comments so I wanted some feedback
on this. Again it’s difficult for the instructors to hear this in a club or
noisy area unless they are right next to you. They did take us to quieter areas
like Barnes and Noble so I got some of it. I also got this on the last day when
we were walking around shopping. I was told that I could come across as
arrogant. This is exactly the shit that I wanted to hear because it isn’t easy
to get honest feedback like this in everyday life. People will just tend to get
pissed at you or walk away without telling you. Or they may not want to offend
you so they zip their lip about it. So in addition to being very helpful about
how to meet women, the course will help your social life in general. But I
think a student should make a point of addressing individual sticking points
with the instructors at the beginning and asking them to watch for specific
things because had I not asked Randi about this specifically I’m not sure he
would have said anything.
Things I found really helpful
1.Hearing a short “routine” demonstrated and being given a written outline of a
structure for a routine. Randi told me that when he first started out he would
run the same routine over and over again on set after set. This was something I
was initially hesitant about doing because it would feel “phoney” to me but now
that I am in the field more, I find that my improv game stalls a lot more,
especially when I am tired so I want something to fall back on (Read “1st post
– Montreal sarge at Traffic” May 23, 2005 in ‘field reports’).
2.Watching a routine being demonstrated and having one of the other instructors
describe in real time what the girl’s body language was conyeying about her. I
found this to be totally mind-blowing and incredibly helpful. In fact I wanted
a lot more of it because I was never great at reading body language.
Suggestions
Far be it for me to tell these guys how to run their business but from a
student’s perspective I thought that the following things might have been
helpful. Breaking things down more in the field – running things more like
drills – like getting the student to use one particular opener and then getting
them to do it like a thousand times and running mini sets. Then maybe the next
night do that with something else like storytelling and IVD (with the same
story and IVD) using the already very polished opener and hook from the night
before – so that by the end of the bootcamp they have a polished routine that
has been calibrated and polished. I came out of the bootcamp with a lot of
ideas and information but I found it hard to approach women when I got home
because I still didn’t have much of a routine down so I was still left with all
the uncertainty of the improv/natural style. Maybe this has already been tried
by the RSD guys – I would be interested in hearing from them on this point.
Despite the detailed criticisms of the course that I’ve provided, the
experience was incredibly liberating and mind-blowing. The bootcamp is worth
every penny because it helps you invest in a skill that will serve you for the
rest of your life. I did things I would have never done. I walked up to a group
of six fairly good-looking girls and tried to command their attention. I didn’t
get blown out like I thought I would. I persisted with a really beautiful
women long after I would have otherwise quit and found that I was actually able
to push past her resistance and get her to practically obey my every command. I
was surprised at the amount of attraction that I was getting and realized that
it was my own lack of experience with attraction that kept me from progressing
on to more intimate situations.
The bootcamp puts so much power back into the hands of the guy by instilling in
him a whole attitude and approach to meeting women (not caring about outcome,
the philosophy that every approach is bringing you one step closer to being
good at approaching, the realization that you can do it – it’s mostly your own
mind that keeps you from doing it – which is not allowed to happen because
these guys literally push you into situations that challenge your comfort
zone).
All in all, just like any learning experience, you only get out of it what you
put into it. The instructors are great but you have to match their efforts with
your own. A good approach is to pretty much just listen to them and not argue
about stuff. They’ve done this thousands of times. Responses from girls become
predictable based on their mood/personality and these guys know the best
responses. Also ask lots of questions because there is a fair amount of free
time (driving to and from, eating together, debriefing).
I’d recommend it to any guy that wants more out of his sex/social life.
David
|
