mASF post by "ThuWacker"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, May 5, 2005I think that one of the big things that really motivates me is looking back at
who I was before the beginning of social dynamics studying, where I am today,
and looking at what I can have in the future. My motivation is probably
different than most. I'm actually interested more in the social interaction
aspect than the picking up women aspect. There are so many more things that you
can get out of this game other than getting laid, an ego boost, or even an
awesome perfect girlfriend. I notice though, that I run into the exact same
thing you are talking about. If I have a newbie with me while sarging, I'll do
any and everything. That makes me rethink about my intentions.
I think though that it isn't all in all a bad thing. I mean, why not use that
to leverage yourself? If you go into crazy sets because you have a new guy with
you, why not bring new guys all the time? Or, like what you were talking about
with the blog, why not figure out a way that really pushes you into set when
you aren't in state? I think one thing to really think about here is whether
its a bad thing altogether or part of your shadow or even just human nature in
general. I'm not one to lower myself to saying that you shouldn't become a
better person, but if you know that your goal is to become a Master PUA, why
not accept this and use it to your advantage? This is just a thought and not a
suggestion. I don't advise becoming or accepting anything that isn't up to
whatever standard you set for yourself. I just think that there could be more
ways to look at this and use it. Is it just human nature to want acceptance
from your peer group? Is self validation as strong as peer validation? Will
your mind get lazy after a while and lose momentum for self validation? Would
it be more worth while in the long run to discover self validation or leverage
the easier usage of peer validation? Would leveraging peer validation increase
the need for it and push you deeper into trying to receive acceptance from peer
groups and years of future pathetic behaviors? Will leveraging peer acceptance
create more powerful neediness in other areas of your life? All interesting
questions to think about.
I find that my non-needy motivation comes hand in hand with my identity. The
more I identify with this being part of my lifestyle, the more I get into
genuinely motivating myself to be this person by law of commitment and
consistency. Just make sure that you are pushing your identity towards what you
really want and not what others in the community or peers pressure onto you.
The question really is though, what do you want out of this? I haven't been in
this scene for over 6 months yet but I have seen people come and go. I really
noticed a lack of willingness to try new things and put aside the outcome from
most people. I think the problem is that they are too focused on not screwing
things up and not on how to get better at doing pickups. I've even had a guy
meet up with me, pick up a warpig, and then get out of this because he started
dating the fat, ugly bitch. I meet people who refuse to approach. I meet people
who think that if they don't absolutely pick up the girl, its not worth talking
to her. Pretty pathetic. But, what is their motivation?
I think its important to know what you eventually want out of this stuff. If
you are just looking to get laid, I can see motivation dropping rapidly after a
successful pickup or seduction or whatever you are studying. I think that's why
most people focus on the attraction part of the method and then seduction. Or
even going straight into seduction. A lot of people are so worried about
getting that one girl that they don't want to fuck anything up and usually fuck
everything up. That, or they have sex with one girl and think they are pimps.
Also, because most guys who get in, get in because they haven't gotten laid in
a long time and that is all they want.
This brings to mind the thought on method vs results orientation. It can be
another motivator in the field. I notice that I still care too much about the
outcome of my situations. When you start focusing on improving the method, and
stop worrying about whether you get that particular girl, you will begin to
progress much faster and learn sooo much more. You will find that you will be
better at seeing distinction and start to get better and better at calibration.
One thing that I will do when I am in the field is say to myself "All that
matters is the method. Outcome is irrelevant". When I say this, I feel the
release in my brain. I all of a sudden become relaxed and focused. Instead of
thinking, "Don't fuck this up" I think, "What new thing could I try on this
girl? Which part of my method do I need to focus on? This is going to be a lot
of fun". Or even more recently, I haven't needed to think much about any of
that. I just do my routines and work my body language and can be very outwardly
focused and think about the entire social dynamics of the situation during the
process. I think this is an emotional anchor now.
I also think a huge motivator is actually getting in field and doing sets...
making progress. I notice that the more progress I make at doing anything, the
more likely I enjoy doing it. I think its in line with David Ds diagram on
being in the "flow" state.
For a while, I pretended that everyone elses goals were the same as mine. I
would catch myself saying, "why are you going to sleep with her if you haven't
been building comfort for more than 3 hours?" and similar things which people
completely ignored. I've denied girls for all kinds of stupid reasons and
haven't had sex with them because it wasn't "solid game". Which just shows me
that I find the process very important(People look to what they have done in
the past to be consist with that and tell them more about themselves). But I
also think its good to note that not everyone has your same goals. So, when you
start telling someone how they should be or act, just remember that what you
want isn't what everyone else wants. So, don't be a cock sucker(I've noticed
lots of guys giving me a hard time on the board when asking questions, posting
field reports, or stating my opinion. Its cool to debate, but there is no need
to try to slander each other or put other people's ideas down. Look at it
objectively. I just have to wonder, do you really think that helps anyone with
anything?).
What I am hopefully eventually going to get to is that I think looking at the
ultimate goal in mind with what you are going to get from the community is very
important. If you are looking for a quick fuck or mLTR or even to become a
master of social dynamics, I think its important to think about that goal,
write it down, get images of you or other people in a situation like that, and
imagine yourself being in that future. Be genuine.
I think even as a PUA, long term success might not be what you should strive
for if you aim is instant gratification with getting laid(I'm should assume
though that you won't be in the community for long if this is your goal). I
think you should really figure out how important this is to you, and then base
future direction off of that.
I am beginning to notice a lot more when I try to receive validation from
others. Its a shadow trait, I believe. Accept it and transcend it. Being a
natural introvert, I've found that when I began this stuff, everything was
about validation(lots anyway). The more I get into it, the less anything is
validation(although I found myself wanting to post more on here to get
recognition from the top PUAs... like that really matters!). But, I also see
myself slowing down sometimes. To answer the thought on directing towards self
validation, I think recognition of peer validation, transcending it and giving
yourself rewards for accomplishment, could very possibly push you towards
this(I may be rambling considering that it is 330 in the morning).
I also found that my mind is very lazy. It doesn't want to think. So, you can
prepare to let it not think. If you plan things out ahead of time, it
eliminates all thinking that you have to do. So, if I don't plan at all, my
mind does the natural lazy thing to do and does nothing. When I plan ahead of
time, I am not only more effective, but my brain also doesn't have to think and
just follows the plan as scheduled.
All of that and being horny. Haha! I'm completely kidding on this one.
Great topic, BTW.
- Thu
I'm Rick James Bitch!
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