mASF post by "Spirit Fingers"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, July 7, 2005Hey dude, I've been learning from Woodhaven and Dimtiri, so I'll help you out.
>1) How exactly do you qualify
>a girl using natural game»? I
>have used swinggcat style
>qualifying with a c&p
>tonality, but that wouldn't be
>congruent with natural game».
>So what is your tonality when
>qualifying, and what kind of
>questions do you ask.
Your tonality should be relaxed and genuine. Above all, don't be snide or
sarcastic. Like, don't be like "heh...that hat's cute (rolls eyes)" Be like, "I
really like your hat. You look good in it."
For screening, you have to determine what qualities you're looking for in a
girl. Then, ask questions to see if she has those qualities. They'll be a free
e-book coming out by Woodhaven and Dimitri soon which will cover this.
>
>2) How much is too much when
>SOI'ing a girl and showing
>that you are interested in her
>before you come across as
>overeager? Let me illustrate
>with an example. As I was
>dropping off an HB9 the other
>night, I said to her "I had a
>really great time" then I went
>in for the kiss. We made out
>for maybe like 10 minutes then
>I pulled back and said "I'm
>wondering if i should go
>upstairs" (yeah i know that
>line sucks), to which she
>replied "no, you shouldn't."
>I agreed with her, saying it
>was too quick. I'm not
>totally sure that she bought
>it though. She said "does
>that upset you?" And I
>continued to try to reassure
>her that it didn't. I said
>that I had fun connecting with
>her. Then I said that what I
>liked about her was her level
>of maturity compared to the
>other girls I have dated.
>
>I'm not sure that she bought
>any of those statements
>because she might just think
>that I am trying to sweet talk
>her into bed. I just have a
>feeling that she saw through
>it as bullshit to sleep with
>her. So what would have been
>a better way to handle that?
>
>I am concerned that she saw
>through it and devalued me for
>appreciating her for nothing.
>
First, this is not an SOI. An SOI is a statement, not a question. Second, an
SOI should be telling her that you appreciate something about her.
The problem here isn't that you showed too much interest, it's that you did it
in the wrong way. If you just took the girl's hand and walked upstairs with
her, it would also have shown interest, but it would have been in a confident
and decisive way that she'd respond to.
You should SOI as much as you want to. If you see something you like about a
chick, SOI her. Don't be afraid of showing interest. Similarly, don't SOI
chicks if you don't actually like what you're complimenting them on.
>
>3) The next question I have
>has to do with general phone
>rules for natural game». If
>you make out with a girl, how
>many days do you wait before
>calling her back?
>
>This is part of the congruency
>of natural game» that I don't
>understand. There is a fine
>line between being direct and
>unneedy, and being direct and
>desperate.
Don't wait any days. Her perceiving you as needy has nothing to do with how
many days you wait to call her. Any needy AFC can force himself to wait three
days before he calls, but he'll act needy on the day2 and give himself away.
>4) How do you handle a
>situation where you are gaming
>a girl in a club, you get her
>number and kiss close, and
>then remain in the club to
>game other girls?
>
>If she sees you gaming other
>girls, it makes your intention
>with her look ingenuine. What
>solutions are there other than
>attempting to push the
>interaction with that one girl
>to the boundaries of logistics
>or venue changing?
>
This is a more difficult situation. If you kissed her and she's still in the
club, why aren't you escalating? You should always take the interaction as far
as you can.
If for some reason you can't escalate and you both are still in the club, it's
going to be very incongruent if you make out with other chicks, and ruin your
number. In this situation, you should move to another club, or just say fuck it
and go for other chicks anyways. But, you shouldn't be in this situation in the
first place.
>
>5) How do you handle the
>situation of telling a girl
>that you don't want to date
>her exclusively? This is
>another congruency issue
>because you are going out of
>your way to demonstrate that
>you like her (by being direct)
>and that she is special, yet
>you don't want to date her.
>How do you handle this and
>still remain congruent?
This is something which I dealt with a few months ago. Explain to her that she
is special to you, and tell her all the reasons why you like her. But then say
that you don't like exclusive relationships, they make you feel trapped, and
they always become boring and stale. Tell her that the only reason why people
become exclusive is because they're afraid of losing the other person...and she
doesn't have to be afraid of losing you. Just reassure her that although you're
dating other girls, you're not going to run off and leave her for some trick
you found in a club.
-Dan
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