mASF post by "wicked"
posted on: mASF forum: Tactics / Techniques Discussion, June 6, 2005I found in archives "SWINGGCAT on Qualifying & Challenging" and part of it is
really useful in this topic so I'll post it here it may help others facing same
problem:
----SWINGGCAT----
Reframing shit tests into challenges:
When I say, "shit test" I mean anything that interferes with or is not
conducive
with either the frame I have set or the intended direction I am taking the
interaction in. Put in other words, anytime she attempts to reset, interrupt,
or
supersede the frame I have set in a negative way, I am being shit tested.
So, when a girl throws shit tests at us—such as, 'do you do this on all the
ladies' and 'how old are you?'—how do we reframe them into challenges?
One thing to keep in mind is that you never want to respond to a shit test
directly. Now, that is not to say, you want be the sort of guy that never
addresses a woman's question in direct way. What I am saying is that you never
want to address a shit test at the same logical level or within the shit test's
frame (Remember: a 'shit test' is an attempt to negatively change the frame we
are trying to set). Why? Because this reinforces and acknowledges their frame.
So how do we handle shit tests? What I like to do is reframe the meaning of
their shit tests. When they shit test me, I turn it around by accusing them of
subscribing to values or having attributes that are undesirable. Then I
challenge them to refute my accusation. This works fucking great.
Let me give you two examples of this from real life (as you will read in the
field reports bellow, these examples are situations that have actually
occurred).
Suppose that a guy approaches a confident hot girl who is up for a challenge
and
does not like rejection. Now suppose the guy runs some routines on her. Suppose
the girl then says to him, "Nice stuff: how many other girls have you done this
to?" An AFC would try to address the question within the same frame or at the
same logical level —huge mistake! Instead, say something like this:
"No, I only do this on girls who seem adventurous because I am only friends
with
adventurous people. And you seemed adventurous. But maybe you're not, maybe I
was wrong about you. If that is the case, then this relationship will never
work
out."
Now often times they will then tell me how adventurous they are. Now who is
qualifying who? Who is controlling the frame?
Lets look at one more example. This is another one that has happened to me in
real life.
There is a certain way girls say, "How old are you?" that means they are about
to shit test you (whether it be that you are supposedly too young or too old
for
them).
So I tell them how old I am and then ask them. Then I say, "well, you are like
ninety years old in girl years…so, this relationship will never work out, your
just too old for me. And woman like yourself probably couldn't keep up with a
young stallion like sexy me." (If they are really hot I will add, "you remind
me of my grandmother who is one adventurous old hag, so, she is cool…are you
adventurous? Good, then you have permission to hang out with her. I think the
two of you are going to be the best of friends…Aw, you are so cute.")
I have never gotten a bad reaction from this.
This works on so many levels. One is that when you say, "you are too old for
me"
you are now qualifying them, not the other way around. Another thing you are
doing is taking their stupid judgmental chick logic and applying it back to
them
in an even more absurd humorous way—very powerful indeed.
--------------------
Resistance is futile.
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