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A little sticking point I’ve been having for a little while now: How to always be the prize? I thought back on every single time I’ve known it was on from the moment I laid eyes on a girl. I thought back on every time I just knew that I could have a chick before I even opened my mouth. They all had one thing in common: I knew that she wanted me more than I wanted her.
Now this could have been for some obvious reason, i.e: she was carrying a little extra weight, she had nasty teeth, she had something about her that made her a 6 or 7, generally speaking. But there have been plenty of times when this phenomenon has occurred when the girl was 8 or higher. So what was the common thread?
Well, it’s a look they give you. When you make initial eye-contact with a girl who perceives your value as much higher than hers, you can see this thought process unfold via facial expressions/body language», right before your eyes. She looks at you, she smiles nervously, she looks down, she may laugh a little (laughter is nothing more than tension being released…watch your favorite comedian to see how they build tension with the audience to get laughs), she shifts her body weight on her feet, unsure of how to stand. When all or a few of these signs are present, you can take it to heart that this girl will fuck you, provided you follow the proper steps to seducing her.
I should add that not all girls will put off these signs. Your really high value girls have become accustomed to hiding their intentions. Call that a poker face, if you will. When in doubt, calibrate.
The common thread with all of these girls, was that when it came down to it, I truly believed that they wanted me more than I wanted them. A girl doesn’t want to sleep with a guy that wants her more than she wants him. There are a number of reasons for this:
1.) When you telegraph too much interest (and this is a fine line: I can speak from experience when I say that if you’re too into her before she’s into you, it’s game over), you come from a frame of scarcity: READ: LOWER VALUE THAN HER
Why would she want to sleep with you if she knows she can have you whenever she wants, however she wants? Seriously, you don’t even have to be doing the typical AFC things, like opening doors, paying for everything, etc. for her to pick up on this knowledge if you have telegraphed too much interest too early on. She senses this on a subconscious level…the same way she can sense that you’re not as into her as she’s into you.
2.) When you want her more than she wants you, it is completely her choice. In my experience, and I’m sure that others will attest to this, when you give the woman absolute control over whether or not you will close the deal (which is what you’re doing when you don’t adopt this mind-set) she will most certainly say NEXT, LJBF, or something equally annoying/frustrating.
That’s not what she wants…she wants to be swept off her feet. She wants to be able to tell her friends things like: “he wasn’t even my type, but god, what a cassanova he was,” or something to that effect. But she’s practically bound by physics/the laws of nature to mentally castrate you if you don’t believe that SHE WANTS YOU MORE THAN YOU WANT HER.
Why?
Well, it’s biologically inaccurate, for one. As men, it’s our natural role to take the lead. This is the fundamental difference between the masculine/feminine dynamic. While it may be true that a good-looking guy with no game (read: leadership ability) will get laid (read: get lucky), it’s always going to be by women that have the masculine traits that allow for everything to come together. I personally don’t like hanging with, much less fucking, girls with those masculine traits. I like girly-girls. I like to feel like I had to do something, to put in some work to get the lay. Those dominant, masculine type women tend to be bullies, manipulators and cheaters anyway.
If you’re not influencing your world, then you’re being controlled by it. Now, notice that I didn’t say dominating your world…this isn’t about being a ruthless dictator, rather, it’s about stepping up to the plate, taking control of those things that you can control and having some actual choice of outcome in your world.
A fundamental premise here that you can control is how much you want her in relation to how much she wants you.
You see that hot girl standing over there or walking towards you on the sidewalk. What are the thoughts that go through your head?
(I know...advanced board...I'm not saying that all of you guys reading this actually do this, but if you are, write this down...)
“Man, she’s way out of my league. I could never get with a girl like that.”
Which leads to:
“She’s probably high-maintenance and stupid anyway…I bet she can’t even do a quadratic equation”
Which leads to:
“Fuck it…I don’t want her…I want a nice girl that likes me for me…”
And the list goes on. Here’s a thought: STOP MAKING EXCUSES (read: reasons you’re going to fail) and START THINKING OF WHY SHE NEEDS YOU!
Without a good guy in her life, what is she missing? A vibrator won’t replace the weight of a man on top of her (I’ve had several women tell me that this part of sex is almost more important than whether or not they actually cum)…
Without a good guy in her life, someone who makes her laugh and feel sexy…where else can she get that from? Her girlfriends? To an extent, maybe…but deep down, which do you think she would rather have?
Without a good guy in her life, a woman is alone (unless she’s a lesbian, in which case, she will seek out a masculine woman like the ones mentioned above) And this, my friends, is where we come in. But we can’t step up and make that difference in a little lady’s life until we understand our responsibility, our role in the natural order of the world. And until you do, you won’t get where you want to be with women. But what’s even worse is that they will continue to be unhappy while wishing for that good guy to come along and show her what she’s been missing.
Ok, so I understand that this post has so far been kind of a rant about some inner-game stuff. Let me give you some practical application.
I started thinking about all this stuff at work the other night. I’ve been trying to distill it into something repeatable as it’s just been such a common occurrence in my life that the women I’ve slept with have been MORE INTO ME THAN I WAS INTO THEM. It was also a common occurrence for the opposite to ensure that I WASN’T getting laid.
The other night, as soon as the thought occurred to me that this value relationship was the real kicker, I decided to try it out on a customer who was eating in the establishment where I work (I wait tables at a grease-pit diner, so as you can imagine, I’m already facing serious challenges when talking to girls that come in to eat)
She came up to the register to pay for her food. As I stood there and looked at her, I basically thought about the fact that this girl has a rag once a month, she eats, she shits, and she farts. As if for good measure, just to drive all those points home, she puts her hand up to her mouth and lets out a little burp just then as I’m looking at her.
Her: (in a quiet voice so as not to draw unnecessary attention to the facts that had been circling in my head) scuse’ me.
Me: (kind of looking at her disapprovingly, but with a slight smile) mmmm hmmm
It was like she was apologizing for something (she actually was) and I was letting her know that I wasn’t having it…in a playful manner of course.
She instantly lit up and started smiling at me. That smile said to me:
“I’m not gross…don’t think that way of me…I’m a pretty little flower”
But we both knew the truth. Even better: SHE knew that WE BOTH knew it…even though I’m just the lowly waiter at the grease-pit diner.
Anyway, this is just one example of the things you can do with this mind-set. Don’t just think you’re the prize…KNOW IT.
peace,
JohnnyC
Lie to a liar, for lies are his coin;
Steal from a thief for that is easy;
Lay a trap for a trickster,
and catch him at the first attempt;
But Beware an Honest Man