JohhnyC69 is a member of the mASF forum. Acronyms used in this article can be looked up on the acronyms page. To get involved in discussions like this, you can join the mASF discussion forum at fastseduction.com/discussion.
Original discussion thread: http://fastseduction.com/discussion/fs?action=9&boardid=2&read=95814&fid=173
True, there's that portion where Baddog was going off the deep end, but for the most part, there is a TON of valuable knowledge back there that is incredibly easy to find without having to dig through the archives.
That being said, I'm no club or daygame wizard like some of you, but I will be glad to bring to the table a semi-concise guide about what I do best: Pulling pussy from the internet.
So without further ado, I'll kick this off...
How I Use Dating Sites» to Get Laid
It's actually pretty simple. Online dating» is more about what you DON'T do. As BlackDragon» has pointed out, online doesn't get you laid, it gets you first dates. As ijjjji has said, "online game» is NOT pickup. It is a logistical tool to get some real life pickup happening."
Both are absolutely right. BD» has written plenty about the methodology behind his system and you will see a lot of this overlap as while there are a few things that are going to be specific to everyone's respective individual style and personality, there are a few things that are universal principles that you should apply to be successful.
I've spent some time looking around the site I use most, Plentyoffish.com or pof.com, at guys' profiles to see the average guy's approach to building a profile. I was surprised to find that a lot of them actually weren't half bad. One in particular that I really liked was this athletic military guy that described his body type as "A Few Extra Pounds" (which is supposed to be translated as "I'm a fucking fatass"), only to see in his pictures that he was lean, cut and very much in shape.
In his About Me section, he had a bunch of ridiculous nonsense, such as, "I speak 127 different languages, have flown around the world backwards and blindfolded, etc.."
It was very obvious that he was joking. He kept it short, funny, but most importantly: HE WASN'T MAKING AN ATTEMPT TO SELL HIMSELF.
In his Ideal First Date section, he made a comment like, "Don't ask me 'what do you like to do for fun' or you're going to turn off my Interested button really fast"
and
"you're not going to get to know me by reading this"
So that's an example of a good profile. But I didn't have look very far to find a HORRIBLE one. It's not worth quoting, but to give you the gist, this other guy was a fucking BITCH. He starts off his About Me section with a whiny ass poem that he wrote. Then he goes on to whine about how he's so misunderstood and how he's had his heart broken a few times and how he knows there is a special little flower out there for him somewhere, etc.
It made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.
The second example is a bit extreme. This next example is not quite as bad, but still something that should be avoided at all costs.
The Infomercial Guy
This is the guy that uses five or six paragraphs to talk about his job, his dreams, his aspirations, his fucking life story...as if...anyone...cares....
Now, if you have two nice cars, a great job, a six figure income, etc. and you speak of these things, any chick that responds to you is a gold-digger looking for a provider husband that she will constantly cheat on with guys like me and that military dude from the first example.
Here's what I say in my About Me section:
"I'm a jerk and I drink too much. I like to have laughs at other peoples' expense, quite possibly and probably at yours, should you for some reason decide to meet me. I'm swearing off nice girls. Run while you still can. You've been warned.
With that being said, you should know that I'm not looking for a fast random hookup. Getting sex is easy. What I'd really like to find is more than a pretty face that I can actually connect with on a deeper level. Rare, I know, but for my myriad of shortcomings, I am what some would call "delusionally optimistic." So whatsup? Are you game to try?"
I just added that last part recently as I'm trying to screen for more quality lately. Honestly, I haven't noticed much difference in the responses I get so I haven't decided if I'll keep it yet or not. Critique on that welcome.
But what do the successful profiles have in common with each other? A few things.
~They demonstrate non-neediness
Now, when I say they screen, I really mean that. My profile sends a clear message to any fat, LSE depressing lumps out there that I will not respond and no, I don't want to chat with your lame ass.
If you're thinking about trying online, try to incorporate these simple principles when filling out the information part of your profile and you will be way ahead of your competition.
Pictures
This one should be a no brainer. If you're athletic, it's ok to have a pic of you with your shirt off AS LONG AS YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING THAT REQUIRES YOUR SHIRT BEING OFF. Outside at the lake, playing some kind of sport, something like that. DO NOT have a shirtless pic that you took with your cell phone in front of the bathroom mirror. Seriously, it screams INSECURE DOUCHEBAG.
Don't overdo the shirtless stuff. One or two action pics are fine. For my profile, I have a picture of me playing a mandolin, one of me shooting a bow, one model-type pic (similar to my avatar), one of me hanging out at a party in a cool white button up shirt, and one looking like a skater punk thug in a hoodie and beanie with a "what the fuck are YOU looking at" face.
So as you can tell, I've mixed it up pretty well with the photos. Diversity is good.
That pretty well covers profile building. Let's talk about openers.
I actually picked up something from the advice on POF on this one.
"We've found that women READ your PROFILE before opening your email. Make sure your profile contains "Hopes and Aspirations", "Hobbies/general interests" and "Musical Tastes" which are all good conversation starters."
Recognize anything there? I swear the people running this site are actually trying to make sure guys are unsuccessful. Everything about that advice is SHIT...except for the first sentence. And even that, you have to apply in an indirect way.
See, while it may be true that in person, in a club on a dance floor, it is perfectly fine to go directly sexual a la Cosy/Sleazy»/TVA», you have to remember that you're not gaming a chick online, you're attempting to get a date. In other words, let her know in the first email that you actually read her profile.
Women get more than enough lame openers online that show without question that the guy only messaged her because he thought she was hot. It's a given that you think she's hot, otherwise, why are you even talking to her? Cause you want to be her buddy? Give me a fucking break. For all the shit you hear women say about how they hate players, that they're not looking for a ONS, etc., make no mistake my friends; they're looking to get fucked.
That being said, it's our job to mitigate the ASD associated with that. See, women want drama free fast easy sex just as much as we do, but they can't come out and say it. You can call that societal conditioning or whatever, but I believe it also has to do with getting GOOD sex.
For women, sex is just as much about the seduction as it is about the release. They don't just like sexual tension, they actually NEED it to get wet. Hence the little things they say that seem to contradict their actions, the little obstacles they throw in our way, etc.
Try not to think of those things as speed bumps, but rather twists and turns in the road that make the journey to the destination a satisfying one.
So in my openers, I like to say a thing or two about something she mentioned in her profile description, i.e:
Her: I'm a recently single woman looking to slowly immerse myself into the dating scene. No worries, Fellas. I'm not bitter nor jaded. I don't think all men suck. I'm not angry. However, I am smart. I understand that time is needed in order to fully gain perspective and learn from previous relationships.
Me: It's nice to see someone that can appreciate the value of patience. Everything is so much better when given the time to appreciate the journey...
Anyway, I thought you seemed interesting and decided to find out if that was more than a hunch. So how was your weekend?
...............
Now, that beginning bit was a tad corny, which is absolutely fine. I tend to dance right up to that line of Romance Novel without actually crossing it. Think Tension!
The killer is in the second bit though: She SEEMS interesting. Is it just a HUNCH?
It's designed to put her to qualifying to ME while being perfectly normal and conversational. They don't always bite, but when they do...oh boy.
Since I've combined these two elements to my opening messages, my response rate has gone up to somewhere around 50-75%
No shit...it's that powerful.
But so what? Getting a chick to respond means nothing. How to move it forward?
Now here's where I am decidedly different from BlackDragon» and Joseph. While all of us definitely understand that it's imperative to get the girl off of the email and onto the phone as fast as humanly possible, our methodology is slightly different.
What those guys do is toss their number out after three or four messages. From what I understand, BD» says something like, "Well this has been cool, but I gotta run. Text me later, xxx-xxx-xxxx"
Joseph's M.O. is very similar.
Now, I don't know why, but I can't for the life of me get a chick to text or call when I give her my number. What I CAN do very well though is number close her. I actually like it that way better as it is a bit of compliance on her part, albeit in a small way.
Here's how my message sequence usually goes down:
Opener
When I say vibe, I mean that I avoid the interview type questions about my job, her job, etc. I like to tease her, make her laugh (in very few sentences). Important thing to keep her responding is to end every message in a question that leads to the meet up in a conversational way. i.e: So do you shoot pool?
So it's
Open
A lot of times, after a few emails, I actually get the girl sending me her number without even asking for it. If she doesn't, however, I say something along the lines of:
Me: Well hey this has been cool but email is too slow. Shoot me your number and I'll text you.
As soon as I have her number, I like to do a little texting first. Mostly chit chat and not very much. Every now and again, you get the overtly sexual chick that wants to swap pornographic pictures of her tits, pussy and ass with you. In this case, play ball! I keep a picture of my cock at full mast on my phone specifically for this situation. It happens more often than you'd think.
Now if you get into this picture swapping with a girl, you know you're pretty well in there. In that case, meet up with her, have a few beers or whatever, escalate, isolate and close. Done deal.
The tougher nuts to crack are the ones that are less experienced, maybe a little nervous, whatever. With those, you gotta pull out the big guns. It's always a good idea to have at least one good thirty minute phone conversation (cr: BlackDragon») with a chick before meeting her, regardless of how DTF she is, but simple fact of the matter is that some chicks require a little more comfort building before pulling the trigger. As always: calibrate.
I should point out here that it behooves you to recognize when a chick is actually into you, but maybe has shitty logistics are is intimidated, and when she is attention whoring and using you for validation.
Some tell-tale signs are when you've pushed for a meet, she's casually agreed. When she sounds non-committal, I say something like, "ok, well shoot me a text around 6:30 to let me know we're still on so I can know if I have to make other plans"
If she doesn't text, I make other plans and stop talking to her. Textbook validation whore move is to re-initiate contact with you only to repeat the exact thing she did to get nexted in the first place. Learn to spot these before they turn into the massive fucking headache they can be.
So you've broken through all the resistance and social conditioning against meeting a guy from the internet. She's intrigued and somewhat attracted. She's comfortable with you. Time to meet up with her.
Keep in mind, you can apply this to any Day2, regardless of whether you met her online or got her number from daygame, club, etc. Part of why it works well for me though is because I've actually used email, sms and phone conversations to get a lot of my groundwork done before ever leaving my house. It's an efficient model that works well for a lazy shit like me.
Standard date for me is off to the pool hall for a couple of beers and a couple games. Most women suck at pool, whereas I'm pretty decent at the game. We casually drink (don't get drunk) play pool and make small talk.
Oh yeah, and don't forget: GIVE HER A HUG RIGHT AWAY WHEN YOU FIRST MEET HER. It sets the tone that you're not afraid to touch her and also screens to see how into you she potentially is. If she gives you a big two armed hug, it's generally a green light. If she gives you one of those lame one-armed deals, it's not necessarily game over, but keep in mind that you may have to repeat the following sequence a little more than usual.
What I like to do is coach her on how to make better shots while incidentally kinoing her. It demonstrates authority over her and mitigates any danger of not being a sexual threat.
When she misses, which happens often enough, I put my arm around her and tease her with something like, "ah that's ok honey...you keep practicing and you'll get it"
This usually leads to a self-conscious smile and a punch on the arm. After about an hour or so of this, she's usually comfortable with me touching her and the arm around the shoulders turns into a hand on the small of the lower back, a hand on a thigh, just above the knee, hair pulling, etc.
Sometimes you'll get girls saying things like, "are you always so touchy feely?"
It's not a bad thing. Just smile and go back to drinking your beer or taking your next shot. She's not objecting, rather she's letting you know that after all of the pull, it's time for a push.
After this has happened two or three times, that is pull-pull-pull...push, pull-pull-pull...push, I go in for the kiss. I don't go for the full on makeout, rather just a quick hot wet one, tongue optional.
Then I push her away and start all over. Back to comfort, pool, beer, kino, until I'm back where I left off and it's time to kiss her again.
As you can see, my sequence follows the old two steps forward, one step back pattern. Every time I repeat the process, she ends up just a little bit hornier than she was the last time I kissed her.
After enough of this, getting her isolated is RIDICULOUSLY simple and easy.
We finish the last game, finish our beers, maybe caress each other a bit. I look at her and say,
"Let's get outta here"
in a confident way that leaves little if any doubt that she will question me. Works like a charm as you may have seen in many of my LR's.
What you do with her then is up to you. I'll leave that to your personal taste, discretion and judgment.
But while we're on personal tastes, I recommend that if you're going to use this method, be creative with it.
In other words, if you don't drink or play pool very well, don't try to pull this off. You could just as easily use this sequence with any game or physical activity like disc golf or dancing. Whatever it is you feel confident enough in your ability to be able to demonstrate authority with.
Oh and always remember, just like club, bar and daygame, the more you open, the more you EXPERIMENT, the more work you put in, the more you'll get out of it.
Please feel free to comment, critique or point out anything I may have forgotten to include.
QT: Be discriminate about the time of week/time of day you choose to employ these methods. I've found that peak times for sending out openers is Monday and Tuesday afternoon/evening. Lots of chicks dreading having to go back to work, had a good weekend and don't want the good vibes/validation to end and you become their way to escape the grind, which isn't a bad place to start.
EDIT: I've been kicking around the notion that it's about time you guys with Mastermind access start using it again. The thing that makes this board so great is not the exclusivity of it. Rather, the fact that all you have to do is click on the little 61-90, 91-120 buttons at the bottom, etc. and all that great stuff we were posting over a year ago is STILL active.
~They make no attempt to qualify
~They offer up a challenge
~They SCREEN
Response
Vibe
Respond
Vibe
#Close