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“Q&A: Great Ideas And Great Comedy” – December 16, 2001
This week we have some great ideas, stories, questions, and best of all, COMEDY. Enjoy!
***COMMENT***
Hey Dave,
I think your tips should come with a warning label: Girls might become obsessed with you…Use with caution. Last Saturday night I met this attractive girl. In my previous days, I would have been Mr. Nice Guy, thinking that was the way to win a girl over. But when I read your tips it all made sense. Teasing them, acting cocky and funny works wonders. She became mine in a matter of a couple hours, and when I used the hair test to see if I could make my move, it worked like a charm. I have always been above average looking, but have never been able to cash in on it. Now that I’m using your techniques in my personality, girls are not a big problem anymore. But, your tips worked too well my friend. She’s become obsessed with me, (I don’t know why), and can’t stop calling me and saying how much she can’t to be with me, blah blah blah. And she isn’t the only one. Girls love the guys that make it difficult on them, especially the really attractive ones. Without your help I would have no idea where I’d be in my love life. Probably still bending over backwards to be Mr. Nice Guy, and probably still always being the “friend.”
MY COMMENTS: I’m really glad you wrote in with your comments, because this brings up a key point…
IF YOU REALLY LEARN HOW TO USE YOUR PERSONALITY TO BECOME ATTRACTIVE TO WOMEN, SOME OF THEM WILL BECOME VERY, VERY ATTRACTED TO YOU. And, in your case, it has gone to the extreme.
As a side note, I have women that I haven’t seen or talked to in over a year still emailing and calling me on a regular basis to see what I’m up to and if I want to get together sometime… I know how you feel.
I know that this will seem like the obvious answer to your problem, but here it is: If what you’re doing now has made this girl feel so attracted to you, all you have to do is act like your old self to make her go away! No, really.
Just start calling her three or four times a day and leaving messages, tell her that you really like her and think she’s special, and that you can’t stop thinking about her.
I know it sounds kind of bizarre, but try it. It’s called “reverse psychology”, and it works both ways.
***QUESTION***
“Hey Dave first I will like to compliment not only your book but the great advise that you give every week on the newsletters. I do have a question for you: I’m 24 years old, some girls say that I’m cute and also pretty smart .I go to school for engineering and I’m about to graduate in six months. However I have found myself helpless trying to pick up women. The reason for that is because I think that most of the time when I go out to pick up girls I usually go with my friends who are far more tall and rich and said by many women more attractive. Most of the time when we go out they usually end up getting all the girls while I just sit there waiting for next weekend to see if finally my break with a beautiful girl will finally come along. Do you have any ideas on how not to feel so intimidated by my friends and actually improve my skills of picking up chicks even if my friends are around?”
>MY COMMENTS: Yes, I have a great idea… next time you’re out with them, walk away from them, walk up to the first cute girl you see, and use the three minute phone number strategy that you learned on page 80 of Double Your Dating».
Repeat.
Are you with me here? When you go home with five phone numbers/email addresses of cute girls that you met, all your tall friends will say “Whoa dude, you’re the man!” If you’re in a place with guys who are taller, better looking, more outgoing, etc. and it’s messing up your game, either:
1) Watch and learn because you’re lucky to have friends who are good with women.
2) Walk around and find a girl (or ten) to talk to on your own, get their digits, and move on.
Don’t stay in situations that aren’t working for you. The great thing about being human and having a creative mind is that you can ALWAYS try something new until you find something that works.
***QUESTION***
“Dear Dave:
I am an avid reader, and I think you are one of the best guides out there. Informative, helpful, and easy. You have your stuff down! But I have one question: I’ve used your techniques, and now I’ve got a number of girls on the horizon, but there’s only really one out there whom I really care about. What I’m wondering is, when that one time when it’s just her and I alone, what is the best way for me to handle the situation of me telling her how I really feel? What should/shouldn’t I say/do, and what are some golden little things I could do?
Thanks, and keep up the great work.”
>MY COMMENTS: Whoa! Whoa boy! Stop right there! Where in my books or newsletters did you see the words “When you are alone with a girl, tell her how you really feel”?!
Answer: Nowhere. You might as well have asked me “So how do I screw up a good thing before it even gets a chance to get going?”
Do yourself a huge favor, and when you’re alone with her KEEP DOING WHAT IS ALREADY WORKING FOR YOU. Here’s the problem: a lot of guys think that it’s a logical progression… “I’ll tell her how I feel, and she’ll feel more attracted to me knowing that I really think that she’s special”. Well, it MIGHT work for you, but the chances are slim. What will probably happen is she’ll kind of drift away, and you’ll wonder what happened. She won’t really know what’s going on inside, except that for some reason she has stopped thinking of you “in that way” and wants to “just be friends.”
I know, I know… how could this be? Well, remember what I always say: We humans don’t want what we have, and we want what we don’t have. So do yourself a favor and don’t mention how you feel until you’re ready to propose. Keep up the mystery, and you’ll be more likely to keep up the all- important ATTRACTION!
***COMEDY BREAK… A REAL LIVE EMAIL THAT I GOT FROM A WOMAN… IN ALL OF ITS UNEDITED GLORY***
“…
all i have to say is that someone who obviously doesnt know adam from EVE when it comes to women shouldnt be giving advice to men about how to be a**holes in the end…..the attraction women have to cocky men snt a learned skill on the mens behave it is is a personality charicteristic and sometimes a personality fluw, to to teach men to be even more inconsisterate of a women with an opinion DRAMATIC or not is totally putting us down. just bye saying to tell us we’re cute when we’re mad doest dedramatize the situation, in that coming from a women you have just pissed the women off more then you know….thank you E
…”
>MY COMMENTS: Take this as a lesson to you. If you want to date highly literate women like this one, then don’t use my methods. I guess she told me.
***AND THE COMEDY CONTINUES…***
“You mentioned in your latest dating tips newsletter that you aren’t an expert in “cock-blocking.” I really hope you aren’t, because guys say cock-blocking before they actually realize what they are saying. Are they really blocking each other from getting cock? No, girls “cock-block,” or stop each other from getting cock, but unless you are gay, I think some of you need to realize exactly what it is you are saying. It is a cute rhyme, & if you need a replacement, why not just say “twat-block” or “box-block?” Sure it isn’t a rhyme & shows assonance, but it is a little better for your sexual orientation. Just thought I would drop that tip for future reference.
Z.”
>MY COMMENTS: Well, I really appreciate you taking the time to clear that one up for me. I always wondered if my readers thought I was unclear about my sexuality when I used the term “cock blocking”, but now that you’ve pointed this out to me, I’ll be sure to use a more accurate term such as “box- block” etc.
Now, let me get this straight… you could have written me with a question and gotten my advice for free, but instead you chose to point out this huge oversight on my part, putting aside all of your self-interest for my benefit.
But just one question? What exactly is “assonance”, my insightful friend?
I know, I know… this stuff can’t be real, but it is. It really is.
***COMMENT***
“my friend i think i finally understand the cocky funny routine, i met a girl and her friends, we started talking and i said to them all, “if you guys are nice to me i might let you buy me drinks all night!! i said a few more things like this and they were all laughing and 2 of them bought me drinks and we had a great time…. j.”
>MY COMMENTS: Excellent. Another guy who gets it.
***SUCCESS STORY***
“I wanted to write and thank you for all the great info in your book and emails. I had to read your book a few times, but once I learned and practiced all of your techniques, I was able to find a beautiful women that I am pleased about dating. However, she often tells me that I am too much of a gentleman and jokes with me about coming over to her place to have sex. We have been dating for a few months now and my question is, is this her way of hinting that she is ready to spend the night with me? Also, for the future what signs will a women give when she is ready to become physically involved? Thanks a million and keep up the good work.
Your Buddy,
“k”
>MY COMMENTS: Um, I don’t know exactly. I’m not sure if having a woman OFTEN JOKING WITH YOU ABOUT COMING OVER AND HAVING SEX is good enough hint for you… I’d give it a try. Really.
When you purchased my book, you got a bonus booklet called “Sex Secrets”. Use that stuff to take things to the next level. My guess is that she’s probably ready.
***QUESTION***
“Dave,
Love your work!!! You are a pure genius. I have told all my friends about your incredible emails. Before your emails, I thought that I was good with women; boy was I wrong. I have always been the completely nice guy to women and it has gotten me nowhere. There was one girl that I was friends with, but wished to be closer to at the beginning of my senior year. Well in short I fell completely in love with her and knew that I had to have her. We would talk on the phone all the time and I would help her with problems she was having with her boyfriend. I made sure that I was 100% nice to her at all costs, and flirted with her just enough. To make a long story short, I never changed the way I acted toward her but as the time progressed she started to dislike me more and more… She is a very compassionate person and says that she has never hated or will hate anyone. Well a few months ago she told me that I was the only person that she hated in her life. Even though I was always nice and didn’t change. This totally made me think about how girls don’t actually care if you are nice or not; they actually prefer jerk I have learned. Because of your emails, I know act cocky, and funny has always been my best trait. I am know a college freshmen and I have senior hotties all over me… Even though I am much better now, I need your help. There is a girl that I am interested in, but I can’t tell if she likes me or not. I make sure to act cocky and funny, and she responds to it nicely. I went to a party at her house, and when the music came on she grabbed my hand and started dancing with me. Does this mean anything necessarily? If not, what should I do to find out if she does like me?”
>MY COMMENTS: Easy. Just get her email address and phone number, set up a time to have tea, and when you’re alone, use the “Kiss Test” that you learned in an earlier email or in my book. That will tell you everything you need to know. The best way to find out is to DO SOMETHING to find out. Asking is the road to failure, my friend. Good luck!
***SUCESS STORY***
“Hey,
I owe u a BIG thank you, my dating has never been better… social life has gone from sitting alone on the weekends to guys begging me to join me on “the hunt” as they “see” I’m so successful with the chicks. I chatted up this chick on the net, she just broke off from her boyfriend, wanted to use me as support but I just carried on flirting like the world was coming to an end. She was all for meeting up but mentioned “being mates” and uses the term mate a lot, trying to signal for us to be friends so I couldn’t use the lets be friends method. Anyhow she is travelling one & half hours for our date & forever starting to chat with me online so she is big in to me. I like to be a performer & being cocky at the same time. I cook a good meal and I was wondering if I’d be setting the right tone by joking “taking you to the best restaurant in town” and surprising her (told her to expect the unexpected) by bringing her to my place which is a highly sophisticated singles pad and showing off with a slap up home made meal and then go out dancing, or should I rather not go down that route?
A great fan from London,
A.”
>MY COMMENTS: Well, a big YOU’RE WELCOME! I think your idea of surprising her with a meal is great. I particularly like the idea of telling her that you’re taking her to the best restaurant in town, then cooking a meal for her. Nice.
I want to mention one point in particular… just because a woman says “let’s be friends” first, it doesn’t mean that you can’t say it! Just wait until the next time you talk to her, then say “Great, well if nothing else, you sound like you might make a nice friend” and let it go at that. It works just as well in either case!
…Well, that was a fun mailbag!
As always, if you haven’t downloaded your copy of my eBook “Double Your Dating” and the three booklets that go along with it, do yourself a HUGE favor, and go get it right now at:
…it’s the best investment you can make in your social life. Just do it.
If you want to send me a success story or question, make sure you send it to me at:
…don’t just hit “reply” this email. And if you do send in a success story, make sure you put the words “Success Story” in the subject!
I’ll talk to you soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
INFORMATION ABOUT THIS QUESTION & ANSWER ARCHIVE:
This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit http://www.doubleyourdating.com/.
The primary textual contents of this archive is Copyright©2001-2008 by David DeAngelo. All Rights Reserved. By your accessing this archive, you understand that the information contained in within is an expression of opinions, and they should be used for personal entertainment purposes only. You are soley responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold David DeAngelo harmless. All names have been changed or deleted to protect the contributors, and questions/quotes have been edited for clarity. By sending David a question or comment you are agreeing to allow him to use it in future articles, newsletters, and writings. Please keep this in mind when you send your e-mails.
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