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“Q&A: Eye Contact & Body Language Attract Women” – May 31, 2006

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“Q&A: Eye Contact & Body Language» Attract Women” – May 31, 2006

***QUESTION***

Just wanted to share a little bit of what your lessons have done for me. I read your book and started concentrating on what I thought was my weak points. I did as your book recommended and started picturing myself as the cocky funny person I wanted to be. I even did the whole daydream practice thing everyday. I work at a fitness center so I see lots of hot women all the time. My biggest weakness is that I look away quickly after eye contact is made. I decided that before I started trying to approach women I would make it my goal for a couple of weeks to just make eye contact and hold it until they looked away. Ok, here is the good part. After practicing eye contact for a couple of weeks and doing the whole mental exercise thing, I was at work one day working out after my break and was practicing my eye contact thing between sets with this really hot girl near the dumbbell rack.

I knew she noticed but it never bothered me cause I had no intentions of acting. Well, I had to go over to get a set of dumbbells for my next exercise and as I got close to where she was she suddenly turned around and said “I have a boyfriend” and turned around. Normally I would have kinda stood there in shock and said nothing but, I guess all that mental practice paid off. With out even thinking or pausing the words just came out. I said “Hey that’s great I am happy for you. (Pause – and in a lower tone) I know this is probably a major accomplishment for you but to the rest a the world this is kinda normal so you might not want to go telling every stranger you see.” Then I just walked off with my weights to do my sets. 5 min later she comes over to me and apologizes and asks for my number. Turns out she didn’t have a boyfriend but was just tired of being picked up by losers while she was trying to do a workout. Thanks for the pleasant surprise!

KAL

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Niiiiice one.

Your letter is really a wonderful affirmation and summary of some of my favorite concepts:

1) Read my book, “Double Your Dating

2) Actually use the material and mentally rehearse

3) Start from where you are

4) Be Cocky & Funny

5) Show complete indifference

6) Use illogical Jedi-Level mind power to create ATTRACTION.

I’m going to talk more about eye contact and body language in a moment, but if you’d like to get the ultimate education on how to be Cocky & Funny, then you MUST take a minute and get this:

[products info link]

OK… onward.

First of all, your story would make NO sense at all to most guys. They would say, “Yeah, whatever. She was probably abused as a child and wants you to be her daddy.” or “Well, if I worked at a gym, I could do that too.”

Of course, you realize that this had nothing to do with it… this was a result of you learning about how women are, then preparing, and then taking action.

I couldn’t be more impressed.

Now, let’s talk about some of the things that were happening that most people would MISS when reading the story…

You mentioned your exercise of keeping eye contact until women look away. This is very powerful. I am guilty of not addressing this issue more often and I’m glad you mentioned it here.

If you can learn this skill, it will communicate powerfully for you. Great job.

You said, “I guess all that mental practice paid off. With out even thinking or pausing the words just came out.”

This is the result of preparation and mental rehearsal. This wasn’t “luck”. Even though the words were unique to the situation, the MESSAGE was delivered clearly. By learning how to better communicate in the language that women understand, you created magic.

And, as for the words themselves…

You just gotta love saying: “Hey that’s great. I am happy for you.” (Pause – and in a lower tone) “I know this is probably a major accomplishment for you, but to the rest of the world, this is kinda normal. So, you might not want to go telling every stranger you see.” to a hot woman at the gym!

You INSTANTLY took a situation that would normally strip a man of all his composure and personal power, and then REFRAMED her words in a way that caused HER to look like the socially inept one.

Then you did something equally powerful:

YOU WALKED AWAY.

In effect, you busted on her, then PROVED BEYOND THE SHADOW OF A DOUBT THAT YOU COULD TAKE HER OR LEAVE HER. Actions really do speak louder than words… most guys would have messed up that situation by standing around waiting for her to say something. You did the right thing by walking away.

When you combine all of these factors together, you get a totally illogical outcome:

ATTRACTION.

She realized that you weren’t just some other loser who hoped to maybe get a date by kissing up to her… You turned out to be one of the EXCEPTIONAL men in the world who have more personal power than her, and one of the even MORE exceptional men who also know how to create ATTRACTION.

This combination made her feel a feeling that you can’t create by DECIDING that you want it. It can only be created by TRIGGERING IT.

Finally, I’d like to comment on the fact that SHE asked YOU for YOUR number. You realize that it’s not typical for a woman to approach a man, apologize, and then ask for his number.

Women will often ask a man for his number just to get rid of him. But not in a situation like this one. This was different. She apologized, then told you that she’s tired of being picked up by losers… then asked for your number. This was, in effect, her telling you that she sees you DIFFERENTLY.

All because of your eye contact, followed by a perfect execution of the Cocky and Funny attitude, followed by an excellent physical demonstration of indifference.

Again, to most men this would make no sense at all. If you consulted most relationship books, they would argue that this type of approach would NEVER work. I mean, men are supposed to “court” women, compliment them… pursue them with gifts and favors, right?

Yeah, right.

The problem is that the mainstream relationship books forgot to TITLE the chapter that suggests this kind of behavior:

“HOW TO BE THE WUSS WOMEN RUN FROM”

…or…

“HOW TO CONVINCE THE WOMAN YOU DESIRE THAT YOU HAVE NO BACKBONE AND WOULD PAY ANY PRICE FOR HER ATTENTION”

…or…

“SIMPLE TECHNIQUES FOR GIVING A WOMAN YOUR REPRODUCTIVE EQUIPMENT ON A PLATTER”.

The question I have for you is…

CAN YOU PUT ASIDE YOUR PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS ABOUT WHY MEN AND WOMEN “SHOULD” BE ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER LONG ENOUGH TO SEE WHY THEY ACTUALLY ARE ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER?

And, can you do what it takes to get yourself from where you are, to where you actually need to be, in order to attract the kinds of women that you would like to meet and date?

It can be done, but you’re going to have to do it.

As I mentioned above, the first step is to read my online eBook, “Double Your Dating“. That’s the best head start I can give you. Just go to:

[ebook download link]

You’ll be reading it within just a few minutes.

And get yourself a copy of my fantastic program “Body Language» For Success With Women And Dating“.

You will learn the “animal magnetism” secrets that guys who are “naturals” with women use to attract women using COMMUNICATION ALONE.

No looks, money, or gifts required.

Go watch all the great preview video clips right now… right here:

[products info link]

And I’ll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. If you’d like to look at the entire list of programs I’ve created to help you learn how to attract and meet women, you can look at them here:

[products info link]

P.P.S. If you’d like to send me a Success Story, Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:

1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs max.

2) Tell me what’s working for you before you ask your question. I appreciate all of the “Your stuff is great” and “I don’t need to tell you how well your stuff works” comments, but the fact is that I DO need to hear all of the specifics… because this helps other guys to see what’s working in different situations.

3) If you have a Success Story, write “Success Story” in the subject line of the email. I read these first.

4) At the end of the email, give me your initials and tell me where you’re from.

5) Send it to me at:

[newsletter sign-up link]

…don’t just hit “reply” to this email.

Thanks!

INFORMATION ABOUT THIS QUESTION & ANSWER ARCHIVE:
This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit http://www.doubleyourdating.com/.

The primary textual contents of this archive is Copyright©2001-2008 by David DeAngelo.  All Rights Reserved.  By your accessing this archive, you understand that the information contained in within is an expression of opinions, and they should be used for personal entertainment purposes only.  You are soley responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold David DeAngelo harmless.  All names have been changed or deleted to protect the contributors, and questions/quotes have been edited for clarity.  By sending David a question or comment you are agreeing to allow him to use it in future articles, newsletters, and writings.  Please keep this in mind when you send your e-mails.

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