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Do You Have Gravity?
by Jay Valens
of The Art of the Pickup
July 1st, 2007
The habits of your behavior may have a similarity to what holds the universe together.
The universe is held together by the force of gravity. Larger objects exert a greater pull on smaller objects. Most of the time, such a force results in orbits, with smaller objects orbiting around big ones. If anyone knows of the opposite ever happening, let me know! LOL
Moons orbit planets. Some moons have even been known to have their own moons. Planets orbit stars. Stars orbit galaxies. Galaxies are found in “clusters” and who knows how big the scale gets.
All these orbits are influenced primarily by gravity and I have two questions you can ask yourself:
1. Do you have GRAVITY with others or do you submit to their gravity?
2. If you do have gravity, do you EXERT it or waste it?
Having gravity in the sense of social dynamics is whether or not other people, particularly women, gravitate to you or not. If that’s not the case now as much as you want (if it was, you might not be so interested to get these newsletters!), it could be that you do have gravity but don’t do anything to exert it.
For example, we have a joke that we refer to guys who hover around girls as “orbiters”. These are guys who orbit around a girl, platonically, in hopes that someday she will finally “notice” them as a romantic option and something someday will happen. For those guys, or “orbiters”, that girl has gravity for them. She exerts it and they orbit. Her force is stronger than theirs and they submit to it.
There are other guys we refer to as “near planet objects” that regularly crash into other, bigger, objects. They are the guys who hit-and-run girls thinking it will create a positive result for them, when all that happens is they smash themselves up while the girl barely takes notice. They make moves on the girls, but they’re all the wrong moves, and repeat this behavior often, never getting anywhere.
Those guys, too, are dominated by these girls who have greater “gravity” in the social dynamic than they do. She exerts it and they don’t know what else to do than figuratively smash into her. Her force is stronger than theirs and they submit to it.
Obviously both behaviors are counter-productive.
The behavior you want is to be the object with the greater mass, the one with the stronger force, so that girls orbit around you and if any “smash” into you (figuratively), you survive easily. Not that you JUST have greater mass 7 force but also exert it.
OK, so other than the analogy, how can you do become a Planet {!name}?
- First and foremost, take stock in your current behavior and ask yourself whether you’re being an orbiter of some kind. If so, that alone keeps you from having gravity, since you are literally giving all your gravity up.
- Next, ask yourself whether your behaviors with women are constantly non-productive and whether you are just smashing yourself up constantly without learning from mistakes or correcting your behavior to be more productive. If so, again you are giving up your gravity.
- Add “mass” to yourself. If you can improve yourself in any way, do so. As long as any process you delve into to improve yourself doesn’t swallow you up into it’s own black hole, you can only increase your gravitational pull.
- When you have “mass”, you can exert it to increase your gravitational pull. I can’t possibly go into full detail about how to do that or else I will have to copy dozens of our other newsletters into this one. Simply put, if you have a great value, you need to be able to relay it in some way, non-destructively. Using the planet analogy again, you don’t want to spew out your value through volcanoes spitting out chunks of your mass at people, you want to simply have a greater presence and greater perceived value in their eyes, and it has to be apparent in how you carry yourself.
You can fake having gravity for a short time but in order to sustain many girls orbiting around you, or even one, for long term, you will need to have real gravity. This won’t happen overnight, but with an awareness of this analogy, you WILL have a much better idea of all the little things you can do along the way to get this working for you.
I’m pulling for you,
Jay Valens
P.S. Don’t become a black hole! Yes, they have the greatest gravitational force in the universe, but they tend to destroy everything in proximity to them!
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