Z is a member of the mASF forum. Acronyms used in this article can be looked up on the acronyms page. To get involved in discussions like this, you can join the mASF discussion forum at fastseduction.com/discussion.
Original discussion thread: http://fastseduction.com/discussion/fs?action=9&boardid=2&read=99992&fid=8&FirstTopic=30&LastTopic=59
What I want to talk about here is the concept of personal identity. There has always been a strong push here towards trying to create an identity for yourself. And that idea isn't necessarily wrong. In fact, I think it's right. But I think the way people go about it and how they process that information is generally wrong in most cases, and leads to a lot of problems and issues in progressing past a certain level.
Let me give you an example. A guy comes here. He sucks with chicks. He's gotten no ass for the first 20 years of his life. His whole idea behind coming here is to get better with chicks, because his life story, as far as he is concerned, is that he sucks at getting any type of girl. And so you see a lot of guys who create these identities for the sole purpose of getting chicks, but are so ridiculously incongruent with these created identities that they end up blowing themselves out all the time. That is one way that identity can get in the way of what you do. Fortunately, most guys go through this phase for a few months and then realize what is going on, so it generally is something that people grow out of and actually is a pretty important part of getting rid of earlier bad habits.
The more destructive way that an identity hurts you is actually buried way deeper in the subconscious. People tend to process their life as a sort of story. They see it as a pattern of events, things that they are a part of and that define who they are. And rather than the guy who actively goes out and creates a new identity, this identification with yourself as a character in your life story can really cause more issues than you think.
When you view your life as a story that you are part of, you allow events from the past to influence your present and future in ways that can really cause issues. Take another example of a guy who comes here and thinks he sucks with chicks. He remembers never having a girlfriend and does everything in the world once he gets here to try to change that. But no matter what he does, that insecurity and feeling of being rejected is always right there behind his motives. And whether it's right away, or after going out with a chick for a couple months, it will come to the surface and cause problems.
When you define yourself by your past, you cut off options for how you can act in the present and future. The way that I like to think of this is in terms of an airplane flight from Boston to Los Angeles. I get up one day and fly from Boston to LA. When I get off the plane in LA, what does anyone there know about what happened in Boston?
Think about that for a second. I'm going to type another sentence right here just so you think about it again. Now think about it one more time. When I get off the plane in LA, what does anyone there know about what happened in Boston?
The answer to the question is they only know what I tell them. And what I tell them, either verbally or nonverbally, is entirely in my control and decided by how I view myself. If I view myself as a creation of my past and hate who I am and act miserable, slouch down, mutter, and do all of that bad shit, then that's how they will see me. But when you get off that plane, you have a completely blank slate. There is no past if you don't want there to be.
The plane is a big example, but it really is the same on a daily basis too. I'm not saying be a fucking idiot who's always smiling and perfect. I'm saying don't let your past influence what you do. When I walk into a bar, I'm not thinking, "Shit, I want to get laid. I fucked up last night, I need to get some." My thoughts are simple. "That chick's hot. Let's get some beer. I wanna play darts." It's all about what's going on now. Focus on the past and you fuck yourself up. If you want one simple message to pull from this, read this next part very carefully:
FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT TO DO NOW. FUCK THE PAST, FUCK THE FUTURE. ONLY NOW.
I think that's all I want to say right now. I don't know how long this is. I don't know if it makes sense. I don't know if any of you will find this useful. But if one of you does, that's pretty cool. And if all of you hate it, that's not quite as cool, but it's still alright. Comments and shit welcome, hit it.
This is something that I debated putting in the Advanced Forum, but I decided to put it here because I didn't want to scare people away from replying to it or thinking they weren't qualified enough to talk on it. It might be a bit heady and not really technique-specific, but I'm going to try to make it work. Sometimes I manage to pull things like this together, other times I end up with a rambling thing that looks a lot like Finnish but with more vowels.
